Feeling Human part seven

Being human now, it feels so good and free, and I am experiencing so much. At first, it was a crazy and strange experience, learning how to breathe naturally (which Leela told me it is something you don’t need to consciously do, you just do it, haha)and drink and eat, go to the bathroom and even sleep as a human. It was all so new and weird, and I felt better to have someone there to help me out to maneuver through this with relative ease.

Fry wants to take me everywhere, and do everything with me. It’s nice. Everyone’s been fawning over me, and my new looks, too. I have seen everyone from Amy to even Zoidberg give me the eye. It’s kinda creepy.

Even drinking alcohol and smoking is different from being a robot. The first day I was human, I tried to drink and smoke as much as I did when I was a robot; Fry had to stop me otherwise, saying, “You’ll get alcohol poisoning or something bad, and being a human being, you gotta find your balance,” so I realized my limit was about six to eight beers in one night, and then I’d need a few days break to have my body recover.

So, learning all of these new limits as a human, I also see the benefits. You can really feel so many things. Joy, pain, exhilaration, hunger, being full and sickness. It is no longer simulated to try and barely represent what that feeling is by definition, but the full depth of each feeling and what it can truly mean by your actual experience.

And hand holding is something Fry has been doing with me everywhere and everyday. It feels different as a human. But, still, I wonder what it means to do this with him.

So, being the up front kind of guy that I usually am, I asked him about it as we went to the cinema.

“Fry… I’m, uh… why… why are you holding my hand?” I ask him, and I see he’s blushing.

“Oh, well, I want to make sure you.. can walk okay,” he looks away, moving his hand away from mine.

“It’s been a week, you know? I’m fine.”

Fry looks at me directly and smiles. “You.. are just so different, Bender.. but, the same..”

“Different because of how I look?” I grin. “I did see myself in the mirror. I’m sexy. I know it. And I got that dark, smoky Mexican skin. So attractive, am I right?” I flaunt myself and flip my long black hair to the side.

Fry nods and says to me in a almost breathy way, “Yes. You are.”

Suddenly our eyes meet and Fry’s pupils get bigger. Oh shit! Is he attracted to me?

“Fry? Just what the hell are you trying to say? Guys don’t just agree to that.. right?” I don’t mean to sound harsh, but I know it is when I see Fry’s upset expression.

“Nothing… nothing! Let’s just get to the movie theater.”

“No, wait!” I pull on his arm and he stops walking.

“Wh-what?” Fry says, his face looking flustered.

“Are you attracted to me? Is that why you keep spending all your time with me?”

Fry bites his lip, and looks down, “Bender, stop. We’re good friends. That’s it.”

“I think…” I pull his head up, and look at him. “Look at us, Fry. We’re holding hands in public. You’ve taken me to practically every restaurant in New New York, bought me new clothes, took me to the Carousal, the pier, to an amusement park, to… it’s like, are you trying to woo me?”

“Is this what it means? To woo someone? I just wanted to take my best friend out to have fun. And show you everything about being a human.”

“And… taking baths together? That’s human?” I ask, wrinkling my nose and narrowing my eyes.

Fry is so red, he looks like a tomato. I back off a bit and sigh, “Look, buddy, you’ve given a guy the best possible week ever, especially since this is my first week being a human. I couldn’t have asked for a better companion. I just… need to branch out too. Hang out with other… people.”

Fry looks upset, but nods. “So, you want to date other people?”

“What does that mean? Date other people? Are… do…” I lean in close to Fry’s face and he looks at me with wide eyes, taking a step back. “Do you think we’re dating?” I whisper.

“No!” Fry almost yells, putting his hands up in front of his face. “No. Never. Look, I’ll give you your space, Bender.” He looks teary eyed and I sigh. “Go ahead. Go see other people. I’m going to go home.”

“Fry, don’t go…” I yell as he runs off, and he doesn’t stop.

“Ugh!! Why’d he have to say that?” I stomp on the ground. “Why did I have to say that?!”

I have to admit, one of the big reasons I wanted to be human was to be closer to Fry. He’s given me such an amazing week together, and I just had to push him away!

“Oh, God! I messed up big time!!” I yell at myself.

I got so mad, I went to the nearest bar.

Maybe I could clear my head there.

All I can think of is Fry and his dumb, sweet expression looking at me, and I close my eyes, thinking of holding him close to my chest, so warm and safe.