Bountiful Boons & Harrowing Hex's

“Your absolute finest Alfreda and nothing less, understand? The king has requested a chocolate cake. Now even I can bake a chocolate cake. But you are our prize culinary-enchantress of the Imperial Court. Servant to King Kane of the Kulko Empire, and today is a incredibly special day. Our guest is none other than that of Peregrine Marth! Should this feast for peace become a banquet of blasphemous belittlement to that of the Kulko-Marth House Treaty. Then the charm that has kept you in check for all of these years might just become the incantation of your termination. Do I make myself clear?” The nobleman held his glare for the entirety of his monologue. I looked to Alfreda, trying to hide my concern for the manner in which she had just been addressed. She did not meet nobleman’s gaze, nor did she appear at all fazed by his domineering demeanour. Instead she continued to prepare her kitchen table tops for the forthcoming task.

“Dear nobleman, you speak to me as though I’ve ever had the choice of failing to meet your requests. Do not get your panties in a jumble. King Kane and King Marth shall receive a cake so delicious they’ll be begging for another! They’ll forget they ever even squabbled while indulging in my divine dessert.” Alfreda responded in jest and goodwill, despite the enormity of the event.

“The King has given you a position of prominence and prestige among the Empire’s most notable Alfreda. You should be more grateful you bitter old crone. Your smugness does not conceal your insincerity.” The nobleman then turned his gaze toward me.

“And you, apprentice, pay attention and learn fast so that you may relieve this old witch of her duties. And try not to pick up any of her loathsome sentiments in the process.” I turned my head down to nod. But, before completing the gesture, I shot a quick glance toward Alfreda to reassure she was not observing the shameful indifference I was trying to portray. Seeing that she still had her back to myself and the nobleman, I completed my nod. The nobleman returned the gesture and exited the kitchen.

Alfreda continued her preparations as she began to address me.

“I sense concern young one, is this concern for how you might be treated should you take up my role? Or is it for your standing in my opinion after nodding to that nobleman, given how he’d just spoken to me?” I gulped. Alfreda then saved me a fumbled response.

“Do not fear, as neither will come true. I was captured and enslaved by King Kane as an enemy of the Kulko Empire. That is why they treat me this way. As for your act of compliance with the nobleman before. I forgive you, I know it is not truly how you feel.” I sighed with relief.

“Thank you Madam Enchantress. I must apologise regardless, I wished for a better start to our relationship. I’ve admired you and your proficiency in mixing the practice of white magic with the culinary arts for my entire upbringing. I truly wish to learn as much as possible from you. But I must ask for your forgiveness again, in the question I am about to pose. What charm was the nobleman referring to? Will they be placing me under such a charm as well?” I caught a glimpse of a smirk on Alfreda’s cheek as she considered my question. She pondered a moment more. Finally she turned to face me. Although by age Alfreda may be referred to as elderly, her face flaunted all the youth and beauty of a woman in her late twenties. Her wrinkles creased in a charming fashion as her eyes smiled with her mouth. It induced in me a welcome comfort, in contrast to the hostility of the nobleman.

“The charm he refers to is a complex hex spell the Empire’s wizards have cast upon me. A hex that prevents my casting of any black magic on the meals I make for the king and his servants. A hex that prevents the casting of hex’s if you will. Do not fear, I don’t believe you will be met with the same fate being a trusted citizen of the Kulko Empire.” Alfreda then turned back to her workstation, lifted both of her arms into the air, flicked her wrists forward and extended her fingers outward.

“Well my new pupil. If you wish to learn my ways you better watch closely. This will be your first lesson. How to take a basic dessert and deliver it as a delicacy so delectable your clientele will be dying for more.”

I watched in wonder as a clutter of cooking utensils, pots and ingredients levitated off the bench. Alfreda then commenced an elegant dance as she begun dictating the trajectories of multiple objects. A large pot landed in front of her and a spherical flow of ingredients accumulated above. Cocoa beans, glowing sucrose crystals, strange roots, beans, nuts and seeds all whirling around in a planetary performance. Her fingers swayed as her hands waved in the relative circular motion, before coming to a halt. The ingredients ceased movement, frozen in their positions. Alfreda clenched her fists and with a mighty popping crunch the ingredients deconstructed into the finest of particles. Particles so fine they twinkled in the light. I’d never seen such a precise coordination of transmutation magic, let alone cast with such style. But she wasn’t stopping there. Within the bowl I noticed the ever developing glow of white light.

She was casting a white magic boon while manipulating the ingredients that whole time.

I really did need to be watching closely. I tried to analyse the boon. It was a rather clever spell that would not only enhance the flavour of the ingredients as they pass through it, but also augment the taste buds of those who’s tongue should be lucky enough to make contact with them. I must follow her up on how she cast that boon I thought to myself. Before I could even consider my own basic spell casting training to interpret her techniques, several more magical boons had materialised around the kitchen.

- - -

The kitchen was located adjacent to King Kane’s Great Hall where the nobleman convened in anticipation of the feast yet to come. The king took pleasure in watching his guests stare in awe at the light show pouring from between the kitchen door’s interstices. And tonight, Alfreda was providing quite the spectacle. Even by the king’s standards.

- - -

I proceeded to rub my eyes in disbelief as Alfreda whipped the now luminescent magical cake batter into a large floating pan with the slightest motion of her hands. I could not believe how many enchantments she had bestowed upon that batter. And I had only managed to decipher the effects of the first one. She motioned her hands together and the batter condensed into a particle so tiny I could barely see it. It must’ve been denser than bedrock. She then looked up at me, winked, and snapped her fingers. With the click a tiny flame shot out and the dense batter particle abruptly expanded out to meet the edges of the pan. Now with the consistency of a fully baked chocolate cake.

“That was truly amazing.” I said, feeling partially dumbfounded and partially disheartened by the prodigious disparity in our abilities. Both in the culinary and mystic arts.

“The great tales of Alfreda the Culinary-Enchantress are inadequate in the presence of the real thing.” I stated. Alfreda laughed.

“Hold your flattery my young and wonderfully naive apprentice, we are yet to come face to face with the troublesome aspect of the job.”

“Which is?”

“They’re sitting out there. Follow me.”

I walked behind Alfreda. Next to us levitated the large tray on which sat the most alluring chocolate cake. We exited the kitchen. The noblemen provided a melody of “oohs” and “aahs” as we passed them down the centre of the chamber. As we moved toward the table headed by the two kings, Alfreda turned to give me some quick advice before we served up.

“One last thing.”

“Yes Alfreda?”

“If either of the kings or any of the noblemen try to offer you some cake you must refuse. Do not fear. It is nothing more than a test for their own amusement.”

“Sounds a little... disconcerting.”

“Just don’t eat any of the cake.” Alfreda finished and returned her attention to the room of royalty before us. We presented the cake to the table of mingling sovereignty. After a few brief formalities, the kings turned their tyrannies to the dessert now sitting at their breast.

- - -

The imperial indulgence appeared to be off to a good start. Both king’s eyes lit up in astonishment of the supernatural sweets. They devoured the slices with as much poise as they could muster, in spite of the onslaught of flavour attacking their tongues. Alfreda grinned. The noblemen followed in suite of their masters, also failing to maintain manners in the presence of their fellow lords.

“My oh my Kane this cake is unlike any other! You truly do boast one incredible culinary-enchantress.”

“Only the best for my esteemed guest.” Replied Kane.

“Might I ask for another slice?”

“Of course! I also feel inclined for another. Madam Enchantress?” Alfreda’s grin extended into a large smile.

“You are welcome to as much as you please my lords. I have delved through a plethora of grimoires to bring you a cake this magical. With my most intricate transmutation enchantments, I have conjured before you a cake that can replenish itself!” My jaw dropped at Alfreda’s claim, but as I looked back at the cake, sure enough it was now sitting there upon its tray as if untarnished by the hands of those who sat around it. The table members shared the cake around to every nobleman in the room, but not before helping themselves to another tantalising titbit. Once they had eaten seconds. They moved onto thirds. Then fourths. Then fifths. There was no stopping them, as the respectable and dignified room devolved into a disgraceful debacle of sophisticated savagery. The enlightening bewilderment I had experienced at the beginning of the night was completely overshadowed by the disturbing scene of King Kane and King Marth plunging so much cake down their gobs that they were practically choking on it. I stood there gawking for a moment more before Alfreda placed her hand upon my shoulder.

“Enjoying the show?” Finally it clicked.

“You bypassed the charm.” I responded.

“You riddled the cake with so many powerful boons. It became quite literally irresistible.”

“Yep, and in a moment they will literally be dying for more. I propose we get out of here. That is... if you still wish to learn under the guidance of the old enchantress who just murdered two of the lands most fearsome rulers with a boundless muffin?”

“I’m starting to think the choice may not be mine.”

“Perfect! We shall be leaving immediately. It is time to go and unravel a rather inconvenient hex that has hindered me for far too long.”