Being Lectured

Normally when anything that shouldn't be talking starts talking, things aren't right. Either it's a dream that you're having. Or that you're drugged or something like that. At least, in my experience you've been drugged to the gills with something. A few times I've heard that sometimes it happens if you have a brain injury. Like it'll mess with you for weeks or months at a time. Possibly longer if I remember it right.

But I definitely know that my head hasn't been hit anytime this week or month. Or year. I'm also very sure that I haven't been drugged as I haven't eaten or drank anything someone else has given me. Not today at least. And this is no dream, I haven't fallen asleep.

I pinched my arm and it hurt so, I'm very sure that I'm awake.

But I'm wondering what is really wrong with me. As my housemate's senior cat, Tellisandra, is talking to me. Or rather she's scolding me for what I had done wrong according to her.. Her big green eyes glaring into mine. Fluffy paw settled on top of one of my socks she had brought to me. Probably didn't like having it in her mouth at all and I might have taken it off in the middle of the hallway...okay, yeah I did that. She snapped,"You are such a slob, Weston! I can hardly walk around the house without stumbling on your stuff!"

"Pick up after yourself! You're a grown man for crying out loud, act like it!",Tellisandra scolded. Turning her fluffy body around and waddling another direction. Grumbling as she walked around. My eyes went wide as I picked up the offending sock. I apologized,"Okay, Telly. I'll try to be more cleanly in the future."

This caused the fluffy cat to stop in her tracks. Turning around, she stared at me with a confused look. Or one that a cat can easily muster. Sitting down, she asked,"Did you understand what I just said?"

"Yeah, Telly.",I inform. For a moment she looked shocked with it. Then she got up and started pacing a little circle. Looking a little surprised that I could understand what she said. What she was yelling at me about. Once her pacing was done, she questioned,"How long has this been going on for, Wes?"

"I only started understanding you when you yelled at me about the sock.",I answered as truthfully as possible. It was the truth after all. I couldn't understand the other times she's yelled at me. Or told me off for dumb things I did. Quite possibly the weird things she's said while high off her ass on catnip. Which I'm guessing is what she's worried about more than the sock. This seemed to comfort her as she laid down on the floor. Looking quite pleased as she stared up at me. Then she chuckled,"Good, I thought I was in deep trouble for a moment."

"Why would you be in trouble?",I questioned. Tucking the dirty sock into my pant's pocket. Crossing my arms as I got off the couch and knelt down to her level. Now it was her turn to look nervous as she set her chin on the ground. If she could nervously smile, she would had. Telly answered,"Uh...well...I'm not always nice when I'm talking to you."

"Well, since you know that I can understand you now. You won't do that anymore, right?",I questioned. Keeping my eyes on her with a slight frown. With this, she got up on her paws and rubbed against me. Acting all lovey. Then she answered,"Uh, of course I won't. Totally won't be treating you mean."

"Now uh, since we understand each other. Let's try existing politely.",Telly stated. While purring louder than I've ever heard this cat ever. It was the weirdly sweetest sound I've heard. And it was sort of funny that she was purring to butter me up like this. She's so very lucky that she's a gorgeous cat. And that I'm not a mean person. Also I get no pleasure out of taking advantage of an old cat. She's a fluffy little sweetheart normally. Just a very old sweetheart that happens to be more of a neat-freak than I thought.

Who would have thought?

Standing up, I hurry to my room and start picking up his laundry. Shoving it into my dirty clothes hamper next to my dresser. Then hurriedly fixing my bed so that Telly has a nice place to lay down. If she feels like it. When I was done with that, I hurried to the kitchen to clean the dishes I just used for breakfast. Feeling a little stupid that a cat had to tell me off into cleaning. While I started, Telly sat on the counter nearby silently watching me as I worked.