Why is it so hard to communicate with your child?

Many parents complain that it is difficult to communicate with their children and feel that the generation gap between them is very deep, but in fact, it is because parents do not do and children "resonate".

Xiao Zheng nagged all day long, but the child did not listen, every time he spoke to the child, the child seems to understand. And, Zheng said, the child's ideas and their ideas are always constantly generating a variety of conflicts and contradictions, and communication with children is difficult and very helpless.

The child wants to buy remote control cars, Xiao Zheng said there are already several at home, but the child said that each car has a different shape, different engine, different operation methods, and different climbing ability. Because of the difficulty in communication between Zheng and the child, Zheng wondered if he was too out of date to keep up with the times if and the generation gap between him and the child was too deep.

Every child desires to be understood and respected by their parents, and as parents, we have all grown up from our childhood to become what we are now. When we grow up from our childhood, we slowly forget what we looked like when we were children, what we thought when we were children and what we thought when we were children, how to be a child and how to understand a child.

A. The 3 main reasons why parents have difficulty communicating with their children

1, parents do not do "resonance"

When parents and children are no longer on the same channel, it is natural that they can not resonate, which is also known as "resonance". Like two people watching two different TV shows at the same time, parents are watching adult TV shows, children are watching their favorite animation, naturally, there is no intersection. No longer on the same channel, naturally, there is no communication and communication.

2, do not know how to think differently

Many times, parents can not understand the child's thoughts and some of the child's behavior. It is because we have forgotten what we were like as children, do not know how to think differently, do not understand the child's small mind, and do not understand the child's inner thoughts. Children think that the world exists in the fairy tale of the mermaid princess, think that there is Ultraman exists, while parents laugh at the child as too childish, and too ridiculous. Just like when we were children, we also believed that there is a real Monkey King, there is a real magic existence.

3, do not know enough and do not understand the child

Many parents are busy with work and housework every day and do not have much time to understand all aspects of their children, for their children are not able to fully understand, naturally, they can not understand some of the child's ideas and the child's inner world. When parents ignore their children's existence, they will drift away from them, and if they do not understand them, they will not be able to communicate with them.

Communication is a way of communication between people who cooperate to accomplish a thing through voice and eyes. The fact that parents live with their children all day does not mean that they know their children well. Parents and children need to interact with each other, often actively, to bring about better communication.

Second, parents and children have communication barriers regarding how to do

1、Learn to empathize

As parents, we need to learn to empathize, that is, to put ourselves in the child's shoes to think about the problem. When we learn to think differently, we will be able to communicate better with our children. When a child believes that magic exists in the world, parents should not insist on interrupting the child's beautiful fantasy, but let the child know that there is no magic or Ultraman. Instead, allow the child to keep the beautiful idea, and when the child grows up, he or she will know the real answer.

2. Respect and understand your child

Children often make some relatively innocent and childish behavior or ideas, which may seem absurd to us adults, but are precious to children, and are a manifestation of their pure childishness. Therefore, we should respect children, understand them, and not laugh at their ideas. This way, children will be willing to take the initiative to communicate with their parents and tell them how they think. This way parents and children can better communicate and communicate with each other.

3、Play with your child

There are many ways to communicate with children, parents not only need to communicate with their children through the way of chatting to understand them. You can also play with your child and play your favorite games with your child. By playing games, parents can communicate and communicate with their children more enjoyably and happily together. When parents often play games with their children, they will realize that they did not know their children well enough in the past, and, failed to understand them.

Playing with younger children is a great way to communicate and connect. Not only does it make the child happy and enjoyable, but it also allows the parents to understand their child more fully. There is not a real generation gap between children and their parents, it's just that children are too young to understand what adults are thinking. And we forget that we were once a child too, and do not know how to play, play, think and understand with our children like peers.