Where's The Tiger?

I can't.

Looking at the crowded fast food place in front of me, I froze in place, making my friend stop suddenly beside me. Charlie looked at me, her warm brown eyes wide with instant worry. Had she noticed I was barely holding on by a thread in the car? We'd been friends for a couple of months now, spending every spare moment together between work shifts. I started crying as I looked around. I don't know what I was looking for, something to make my chest feel less tight. She stepped closer, asking, "What's wrong?"

I notice someone walking by and I ducked my head, hiding my tears behind my curls. Once his back was to us, I shook my head, trying to find the words. Nothing is wrong. I don't know why I'm crying. I shouldn't be crying because the fast food place is busy, but there's just so many people in there. I was fine in the mall, but now I can't stop crying, and it's hard to breathe. "I d-don't know why I'm crying," I tell her as I grab at the bottom of my hoodie. I try to look for a solution. We need to eat. There are tables around us, but it's dark, and it's cold. It's too cold to sit outside. I hate the cold. "I'm sorry," I tell her because I don't know how to fix this and I'm still crying. "There's... nothing wrong, I... don't... know why I'm crying," I manage through my tears, gasping in-between words. I half expect her to tell me to bubble all this up, because that's what I'm trying to tell myself. I kind of want to hear it out loud.

"It's okay," Charlie tries to assure me, instead. She'd never be as mean to me as I am to myself. "It's okay, don't be sorry." It's not the first time she's seen me cry, but I still feel bad. We have to be at work soon. I have to run an entire staff in two hours and she has to be a part of that staff. I can't stand here sobbing at her doing nothing. What if she doesn't eat because I can't get it together? I have to do something. Through my tears, I notice the cars wrapping around the building we standing in front of.

"Can we go through the drive-through?" I whine as I wipe at my face with my sleeve that are too long and cover my fingers. I'm trying to take a deep breath, but I'm just gasping.

"Yeah, of course," she tells me as she takes my hand and leads me back to her car while I try to keep my tears at bay with my sleeve. We get back in the car and I can finally settle my breathing a little. I can hold in the tears just a little now that I'm not faced with having to go in that building. "I'm sorry," I tell her again.

Charlie grabs my hand once more, locking her fingers with mine as she tells me, "It's okay, Jac." She smiles at me and she drives us around to get in the drive-through line. "We can eat in the car. It'll be okay."

I sink down in my seat, still kind of sniffling as she finds out what I want to eat so she can order for both of us. My favorite extrovert. I sort of hold my breath as she orders from a guy bundled up in branded merch with a tablet. I refuse to look at him for more than a second and pretend to play with my phone instead.

It takes a few minutes after that to get our food, and I try not to keep apologizing as she finds a place for us to park. The car stops, and now I'm crying again because I wanted to explain. Only, I don't even know what I was going to say. Charlie tries to help me calm down before her eyes spark with an idea, and she demands to know, "Where's the tiger?"

Confused, I point to the back seat. She practically tries to climb the center console in her quest before giving up with a dramatic sigh and scurrying from the car. Her antics slow my tears, and I watch her in mild wonder. She digs through our bags for a moment as I finally dry my cheeks. We'd gone to the mall because she needed a dress, and I needed a "big girl" coat, so of course I left with a stuffed animal.

"Here we go!" Charlie cried out in triumph before climbing back into the car and handing me my new stuffed animal, before taking our food from my lap. I pet the tiger's soft fur, running my fingers over his stripes, and noticed my chest wasn't as tight.

"You don't like to be cold," she mumbled to herself as she leaned closer to the buttons on the dash and turned on the heater. Warmth started to fill the car before she sat back and smiled at me. She watched me not going for the food yet. She was making sure I was okay, I was sure.

"Thank you," I sighed as my fingers brushed over soft orange and black fuzz, and I was able to take a deep breath and smell the chicken in the containers on her lap. "I feel better now."

"It's no problem," Charlie hummed, "It happens."

"Thank you," I mumbled again, thankful she was there.