The Void Can’t Be Filled

Days when my pops was alive/ Were the best, he wasn’t just my pops, he was my pride/ I was shattered finding out he would not survive/ I would be in denial and whatnot and deny/ Thinking how could this cancer make him drop and die/ Seeing him on a hospital bed as I watch him lie/ It was stage 4 cancer in the kidney/ Therefore it was a disaster and it was a pity/ Even got a pastor named Big, see?/ To read a few chapters, pray to see if he would live free/ He was on hospice/ I’m giving you the gist of it, the synopsis/ They said the tumor was huge/ They wanted to know why something wasn’t done sooner, I was blue/ It seemed he was toomed, the thing was hard too/ Felt it when I touched his tummy, it consumed his kidney/ His life was in the hands of God, but it seemed it was in jeopardy/ Home health aide tried giving him meds/ He wouldn’t take it, he trusted no one at that point, he was living through in stress/ And I didn’t wanna experience his death/ But unfortunately come May 23rd., I bid him farewell, he was laid to rest/ Went to the beach that day/ Coney Island to be exact, Brooklyn NYC was the place/ I was at ease that day/ Until I received the news that he’s deceased, I was dismayed/ Rushed home/ Was in denial about his death, thought he was in a coma, felt like a crushed bone/ Got there, entered his room and saw his lifeless body lying there, seeing what’s wrong/ He died, oh why?! It’s a very depressing and sad story to touch on/ It was devastating, feeling like I bust my dome/ The body removal technicians came to cover my dad up in blankets and a comforter/ He was gone for good, it left a void that couldn’t be filled, opposite of a go-cart buffer, word!/ This feeling was the worst feeling ever, way more than wifey when I almost broke up with her/ You went through the Pearly Gates/ I strongly believed he’s left the world to a better place/ Leaving a world of hate/ My dad was a warrior, a fighter to the very end, poor King/ Weighing the two, Stage 4 kidney cancer vs the morphine/ The weakening was great on both sides unfortunately/ I thought death wasn’t gonna be his portion it seemed/ Like what my dad used to love to say when he was alive forcing, “believe me to be”/ He was bold, fierce and fearless since he was young in Ghana under the sun scorching, back in the Nkrumah regime/ He had to make funeral arrangements/ The following day called Social Security to report his death, was vulnerable, I couldn’t fake it/ Started working on his obituary, making sure it was suitabe as I made it/ Oh, as for the funeral it was beautiful how the day went/ Read the hardest tribute that I could ever write for my dad/ He was my father, my best friend, my older brother, I read it like I wasn’t mad/ That he passed away, reflecting on the good times, my life with him made me glad/ We were so close/ Infact we were inseparable, it was hitting me slowly as I watched him go below/Into the grave in his coffin, he was a good man, truth be told/ I want you to know/ We will surely meet again/ In the afterlife, so I’ll wait to see you then/ Be me, my mom, wife and kids’ guardian angle, watch us like a thief with gems/ I’ll never forget you, till we gather again, lyrics from one of the deepest hymns/