The second Rule of Carebear - we always look after each other like we are family.

In the last two years, despite being a college educated white woman, everything I have ever believed has been twisted to the point I could not go back to my job as a Juvenile Probation Officer, which legally I still have and want nothing to do with. I knew the best of the world two years ago, police officers were good, they solved crime, didn't turn their backs on their own, they didn't want to hurt, lie and victimize people, Police Chiefs took looked into it when a majority of their force was targeting one person, they were also lovers and friends, who never didn't have time to help me when needed information or someone to tell me I mattered. Now, I can barely remember a good one. I know them when I see them but I always considered them family, I wanted to be a lawyer to protect their rights. I created a beautiful project for them, which I would do if things weren't so hard. I don't want good ole boy backroom justice. I want the truth to be told, people to listen to it and be outraged like I am. To say she is too important to lose, there is no one like her and she should never have struggle, hold everyone accountable or worry for a second about her animals. I want the good people to help me build Carebear, to knock down walls, for amends to be made.

Aside from what has been done to me, law enforcement obstructing justice doesn't win them a place in Carebear. Good people support, and good people appreciate. Anything anyone I never knew, or never wanted to I didn't need to see. These amazing young women and men I didn't know until the day I got a dead car battery, are more family and looked after me better than an entire state has. They knew I was trying to create this space for them, their children where we were all family. They are better judges of my character, and just like having my animals killed by police officers, and every law enforcement agency acting like them when I never had an issue with them, just like not having the men I respect and who wanted me to be a lawyer, I need those people to adopt me back because they are already family and friends to me. The encouragement I don't need. I need the world to adjust in the direction of my dreams- which are amazing things. It is always the women, that can't take responsibility for their actions and want me to have to struggle. Real Women don't treat men as second class. Real Women are as outraged as men should be because I have taken the hit over and over because they are petty and Mean Girls. I may not be the beauty I was but I my heart is still, what it was. Good people aren't silent when something has been done to someone that is so surreal. I couldn't even get a rape crisis center in Georgia to help me. When you take away everything and everyone someone has ever known, because everyone else fucked up, things have to get made right and quick. For two years, I have tried to get anyone to do anything for me, return a phone call or act with some common sense. I am not a fugitive from justice, an ex convict, a dependency petition, a psych case, anything more than who I am. I miss people who thought what one police department did was bad enough, that the rest of them did not have to copy cat them. My life isn't a movie in the making, or some version there of. I don't need to take responsibility for every crime committed against me. No on e has been through as much hell as I have in the last two years with the least amount of anything. I need law enforcement officers to do their job and stop making me sort out who did what and what violation of the OCGA they committed. I need my personal life back, the people that I wanted to hire, the people that are family when I have been blamed by everyone for every thing. People do not thrive in isolation, people do not do well being accused of everything that they didn't do. Evil wins when good people do nothing. I don't need a day in anyone else's job. I need the people that I adopted to rise up and fight where I can't. I need things to be good not a simulation of some place that broke me. I need people to fight crime, and return phone calls. I need everyone to do what they have always done, support me. The people who done that are not the people that Carebear was for. It is not a victim's job to advocate for themselves, or have to try so hard that every day is a failure. A well behaved woman can make history if the world stops acting like it the LSAT. The LSAT is one day, a grueling test I have to take again because of the Pooler PD, and every agency I have gone to for help. I shouldn't have to plead my case with everyone every day. I'm not a defendant. The real defendant's need to be put in a holding cell until I can testify against them at trial in a Federal Courthouse. I need my belongings back, not to have clean up the mess police keep making. It is the easiest solved Federal RICO violation in the world. Police departments have created it with victimization and violation of every law, policy, amendment. No class of people has ever been treated as badly by every place that is supposed to help them. I would never represent those people. I know bad when I see it. The Good, The Bad and the Ugly is not a movie choice I would ever have made, nor is it my life. I have always been the exception to everything that was bad about people, that hasn't changed. I don't work for free, I tell it like it is, I don't lie, I don't need to sell my case to an AUSA. It is fucking obvious everyone has fucked the hell up and it's not my fault. I can't control people's lives. I don't need to do community service because rape and theft, and are far more criminal than walking to buy a soda and being stopped by the same department that killed my animals and almost has me. I don't anyone to control my life, my firearm, my rights or my choices. If you did something wrong, if it isn't too late and you don't belong behind bars for it, apologize, make it right with me. To the cops, I wouldn't co with you on my best day, because not one of you is an example of anything I want to be a part of except for Richmond County Sheriff's Department. They cared about someone they had never met, couldn't arrest the people who hurt me and they with one exception are the best. I worry about them every day, just like I do my animals. It may be bizarre but I never had my life as obstructed as it has been the last two years for doing nothing other than telling the truth, and being broken down by the exact people I wanted to help. I wouldn't help the ones that hurt me. The Good ones that need me got me...just let me know if you want another family member.