Silence and Stigma: The Perfect Storm

The sun sets over Juba, South Sudan’s bustling capital, casting a golden hue over the patchwork of urban and rural lives now intertwined. In a nation where traditions and modernity converge, where rural customs meet urban realities, the dynamics of relationships, particularly polygamous ones, take centre stage. Beneath the surface of these relationships, however, lies a less discussed but critical issue: the prevalence and management of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). What happens when trust, silence, and cultural norms collide with the stark realities of public health?

South Sudan, like many African nations, has a deep-rooted history with polygamy, a practice where one man marries multiple wives. My father is one of them. For many, it is a symbol of status, cultural identity, and economic stability, they argued. According to a South Sudanese (cultural conservative men) polygamy men, the more wives you have, the more respect you earn and the more children you have, the more wealthy you are measured and the more society holds you highly. Let that slide, however, as society transitions from rural villages to urban centres, the dynamics of polygamous relationships face new challenges. Among these is the rise in STDs, driven by limited health education, stigma, and the complexities of sexual intimacy in multi-partner marriages.

Silence and Stigma: The Perfect Storm

In many parts of South Sudan, conversations about sexual health are shrouded in silence. Talking openly about diseases like HIV, syphilis, or gonorrhea is often seen as taboo, a problem that thrives in the shadows. When a polygamous husband contracts an STD, does he inform his wives? Cultural expectations often place men in a position of authority, making it difficult for them to admit vulnerabilities such as illness. Instead, silence becomes a shield, even if it risks the health of the entire family.

The same silence traps women. A wife who suspects she has contracted an STD may fear speaking out, knowing the societal backlash could label her as unfaithful or "impure." In polygamous settings where jealousy, competition, and survival sometimes define relationships among co-wives, such issues are rarely addressed constructively. As a result, diseases spread, not out of malice, but out of the inability to confront uncomfortable truths.

Trust in the Time of Polygamy

Trust is the cornerstone of any relationship, but it takes on a unique form in polygamous marriages. How does one build trust when multiple partners are involved, and sexual health is rarely a topic of open discussion? South Sudanese society typically assumes that a man marrying multiple wives has the means to care for them financially, emotionally, and physically. But how often do we ask whether that trust extends to his sexual health? Are potential husbands and wives undergoing health screenings before committing to these long-term relationships? In most cases, the answer is no.

This lack of screening reflects a broader challenge: the absence of accessible and culturally sensitive health services tailored to polygamous families. While urban areas like Juba may have clinics, rural communities where polygamy is most prevalent often lack facilities or trained professionals to provide testing, treatment, or education about STDs. Without these resources, reliance on trust becomes both a necessity and a gamble.

When One Suffers, All Suffer

Polygamy ties individuals together in unique ways. It’s not just a union between a man and his wives; it’s a series of interconnected relationships where the health of one person can affect all. What happens when a polygamous husband contracts an STD and continues having unprotected sex with his wives? Or when one wife is infected and unknowingly passes it on to her husband, who then transmits it to others? These scenarios are not uncommon, yet they are rarely discussed openly.

The consequences transcend to physical health. STDs can fracture families, breeding resentment and mistrust. A wife who discovers she has been infected might question her husband’s fidelity or her co-wives' honesty. The husband, in turn, may deny responsibility, further deepening the divide. In a society where family unity is paramount, these cracks can have far-reaching implications.

Breaking the Silence

So, where does the solution lie? First, it begins with breaking the silence. South Sudanese society must create spaces both formal and informal where sexual health can be discussed without fear of judgment or stigma. Community leaders, religious figures, and health professionals all have a role to play in normalising conversations about STDs. When people feel safe to discuss these issues, they are more likely to seek testing and treatment, protecting not just themselves but their families.

Second, education is key. Schools, churches, and community centres can serve as platforms for teaching young people about sexual health, consent, and the risks of unprotected sex. For adults already in polygamous marriages, outreach programs can provide vital information about the importance of routine health screenings and the use of protection.

Third, healthcare systems must adapt to the unique needs of polygamous families. Clinics should offer family-based health services, allowing husbands and all their wives to undergo testing and treatment together. This approach not only ensures comprehensive care but also fosters transparency and trust within the family unit.

Finally, society must rethink how it views trust in polygamous relationships and health surrounding it. Trust should not be blind; it should be built on shared responsibility and accountability. This means encouraging open communication about sexual health before marriage and throughout the relationship. It also means empowering women to advocate for their health without fear of stigma or retribution.

A Healthier Future

Change will not come overnight. The challenges facing polygamous families in South Sudan are deeply rooted in culture, tradition, and systemic gaps in healthcare. But every journey begins with a single step. When we address the silence, stigmas, and structural barriers that fuel the spread of STDs, South Sudan can begin to rewrite the narrative of polygamous relationships.

Imagine a society where a husband feels comfortable admitting to his wives that he needs to see a doctor, where a wife can ask her co-wives for support in seeking treatment, and where health clinics welcome polygamous families with open arms. This vision is not just idealistic, it is achievable.

In the end, the dynamics of any relationship, monogamous or polygamous boil down to trust, communication, and shared responsibility. If we embrace these values and prioritising health, South Sudan has the opportunity to preserve its cultural practices while safeguarding its people. And in doing so, it can set an example for how tradition and modernity can work hand in hand to build a brighter, healthier people and healthier future.

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