Real-Life Toddler Survival Tips for Tired Parents

My toddler is currently in the stage where he needs someone to watch him play at all times, and honestly, I wouldn’t want to leave him alone for too long anyway. If I try to take a moment to put on a load of washing or prepare food, he wants to be a part of the action. And I don’t even think about trying to go to the toilet alone.

This doesn’t leave much time for myself or housework, so I’ve had to develop a few survival strategies to help me get through the day with most of my sanity.

You Don’t Have to Sleep When the Baby Sleeps

When I was in hospital after having my son, I remember hating my lactation consultant with a passion. She’d fly into my room first thing in the morning and start groping and prodding me. Sometimes I’d have her on one side and a midwife on the other literally milking me like a cow for half an hour. Once we’d extracted enough milk to get my son fed and back to sleep, she’d bark her orders at me before leaving, “Now you need to go back to sleep!” I’m sorry, but after having people invade my personal space for an extended period, I just wanted a quiet minute to myself to sit and eat my cold, congealed hospital breakfast and watch some terrible daytime TV…and maybe complain to my husband about how infuriating the lactation consultant was.

We don’t get much time to ourselves, so if staying up after your kids go to bed and sitting in a quiet dark room scrolling social media helps make you feel normal, then do it. You might be a little tired in the morning, but you’ll survive. You’ll get through the day by thinking about the me-time you’ll make for yourself again that night once the kids are asleep again. And the cycle continues.

Pick Your Toddler Battles

My son had just gone from touching the power point, to pushing buttons on the robot vacuum, to pulling the cat’s tail, then back to the power point. I’d spent five minutes saying “No,” “Don’t,” Stop.” I was starting to hate the sound of my own voice and feel like a giant nag. He then proceeded to eat a piece of food that had fallen on the floor. Before I once again went to tell him not to do something he wanted to do, I stopped and thought about the situation. The food had only been on the floor for about five minutes. The robot vacuum had done its rounds for the day. The floor is relatively clean. Screw it, what’s the worst that could happen? I let him eat the food and avoided more negativity — and another tantrum.

Screen Time in Moderation Can be OK

When our son was born, we heard from multiple experts and other parents that screen time under two years old was a big no-no. It’s believed that screen time can hinder language development and social skills, which I’m not denying at all. I used to hear other mothers talking about how they don’t allow screen time at their house and I’d feel guilty. Then I thought about it realistically. We let our son watch The Wiggles for 30 minutes a day while he’s drinking his bottle before going to bed. Occasionally, if we’re having a rough day and someone is unwell, we might also watch another 30 minutes during the day before nap time. Is this really going to cause any permanent damage? When I see the way my son’s eyes light up when we ask if he wants to watch the Wiggles and then I watch him counting to 20 along with them when they do their regular counting song, I can’t see any problems here.

Lower Your Standards... and Then Keep Lowering Them

You’ve had a busy morning with a clingy toddler. There’s a cold coffee and half-stale piece of toast sitting on the bench where your breakfast was interrupted multiple times to read “Where’s Spot?” over and over again. Now your little one is finally tucked in bed having their nap. Do you really want to wash those dishes and hang out the washing? I’m guessing no! I’ve come to accept that my house will always be messy, and I’ve stopped caring what other people think when they come over. If my house is a total pigsty, but I’ve spent the morning keeping my son fed and happy, mission accomplished.

We have developed a good system at my house where my husband will do the evening bottle/Wiggles routine and I will use this time to run around and do a quick tidy of the house. I get as much as I can done in the 30 minutes, but once my boy has gone off to bed, I stop and I sit.

Always Have an Emergency Meal Handy

There’s no way I’m going to tell you that you need to get up on a Sunday morning and meal prep your meals for the week so you have a fully stocked freezer. That’s completely unrealistic. But having just one pre-prepared meal in your freezer — ready to pop in the oven or microwave — might just save you from a meltdown in the kitchen one evening. It doesn’t even have to be one you’ve cooked yourself. I’m a big fan of a pre-made pasta bake from Woolworths. They feed a family of four, can be kept in the freezer until needed, and take about 30 minutes to cook in the oven.

I’ve had countless afternoons and evenings where I’ve finally made it to the kitchen with a toddler attached to my leg and the thought of dicing carrots and filleting chicken makes me want to sit on the floor and cry. Enter the emergency pasta bake. When does a big bowl of carbs not make a situation better? (Unless you’re gluten-free — then I fully support your bowl of whatever food you find comforting.)

On the same note, I highly recommend having an emergency block of chocolate stashed away for yourself somewhere for those late-night scrolling sessions.

Parenting a toddler can be challenging — but also fun. If we’ve made it to the end of the day by pairing an emergency Wiggles episode with an emergency pasta bake, and I’ve still got most of my sanity, then we’ve had a successful day.

Bonus Tip

Learn to love iced lattes — they’re already cold, just like the morning coffee you’re drinking now.