Negative Father

　　The story also starts on that night three years ago ......

　　That day, my father came back very late and also drank. As far as I can remember, my father had never come home so late and drunk, which is impossible in my memory.

　　When my mother saw this scene, she didn't scold my father, she just washed him and helped him go back to his room to sleep. It was after that night that my father became a different person.

　　After that, my father came back extra late every day, not only deliberately not to give my mother a good look, but also indifferent to me. Sometimes, when he was drunk, he would even break things in the house. Although my mother was not angry, I would occasionally see my mother alone hiding and crying. Over time, I began to hate my father, and I especially hated him. The shadow of the exemplary husband and father that people used to regard as a model was completely gone.

　　That night, my father also came back late, and by the time he returned, it was after 1:00 am. I was awakened by the sound of voices outside the room. Originally, thought it was my mother and father arguing, after all, my father had been like this more than once or twice. It seemed to me that it was time for my mother to explode! I didn't go out of the room, just held my breath and listened carefully.

　　"Yaqin, Yaqin ...... Ya-qin, I like you, I'm not drunk ...... and now I've met you again, which means our fate is not over! I will not let you leave me again. After a while, divorce with the one at home. I'm rich now, your parents won't oppose it anymore! ......"

　　The voice was so loud that after I heard it, I rushed out of the room in extreme anger, and it turned out to be my father alone talking drunk. He was holding his mother's hand tightly, but his mouth was calling her name instead. I walked slightly into my father's heels and smelled a very strong smell of women's perfume on him as well.

　　The mother saw me out, and quickly said to me: "It is so late, go to bed, tomorrow there is still school, your father is fine, just drunk, his words are drunk, you quickly go to bed!" I looked at my mother, her eyes were already moist, but the tears did not flow down. Seeing my mother like this, I had to listen to her and go back to my room. But I didn't fall asleep again that night.

　　"Yaqin", this name is so familiar, I think I have heard it somewhere! I thought about it more carefully, and yes! It was Yakumo! It was my father's first love in college. Once, my father told me about it. Her full name is Shen Yaqin, in college for four years in love with my father. Later, when he graduated from college because Shen Yaqin's parents dislike his father in a rural area, and have no money, so the two of them were strongly broken up. After graduation, the father never saw her again. After two years, only to meet my mother, then and my mother started with nothing to have a happy life now. No wonder my mother was sad this time. At once, I thought of the words: "Men become bad when they have money! There is no such thing as a good man in this world!" Thinking about my father who was drunk and full of yakin, and then thinking about my mother, I couldn't get angry. I hate this father more and more!

　　It is also from that night onwards, that the father even sometimes night simply does not come home. Just come back also sleep on the sofa. Although my mother was sad, she didn't change and still treated my father as she did before. I was particularly puzzled at the time, even if my mother had a good temper and a large tolerance, she could not be so generous to my father! So one time, I mustered up the courage to ask my mother, "Why? Father is like this now, you don't even care about him, and you still put up with him like this?" After listening, my mother said to me, "Your father must have his unspeakable hardships, even if he divorced me in the end, I hope you don't even hate him." At this point, my mother quietly fell into tears, in order not to let me see, she hurriedly turned her head away to wipe away the tears just left. Then turned back to me and said: "I know, you still do not understand! I have to ask you, which woman would tolerate her husband having a woman outside ah? It's just that I believe in your father, and I believe he has unspeakable hardships! Even if he divorces me now, I will respect his choice. I know you hate him, but he loves you, and he loves me!" Saying that my mother told me a past story about her and my father ......

　　I remember that at that time, just given birth to you in the month, because my body is particularly weak, and then your father heard the village people say that eating fish can make up my body, but at that time, our family is still very poor, it is impossible to give me the only money in the family every day to buy fish, and besides, at that time, your grandparents are sick, everywhere need money. So, your father went to the river not far from home every day to catch fish. When I was in labor, it was winter, so cold, but your father went down to the river for a month and a half to catch fish for me. Now he has serious rheumatism, which is the root of the disease at that time! And then there is your father's kindness to me, I will never forget! After hearing this, I was touched by my father in the past, but I still hated him very much in my heart, and at the same time I felt very proud.

　　Sometime later, my father divorced my mother! I hated him so much that I resolutely wanted to live with my mother. My father still looked happy, and the day he left, he didn't look back and disappeared quickly from my and my mother's view. After he left, I swore in my heart that I would never recognize him as my father again, that I would study hard and take good care of my mother when I grew up.

　　A few months later, something even more unfortunate came to our family again. My mother was unfortunately diagnosed with uremia and needed a kidney to live. However, after searching for a kidney source, I couldn't find one that matched my mother. Later, I cried and reluctantly told my father about the matter, for one thing, my father knew many people who might be able to find one; for another, I wanted him to come to the hospital to see my mother, after all, I knew my mother always thought of him in her heart.

　　When I came to my father's company and saw him, he had a hat on his head and was talking business with someone. When he finished talking, I quickly told him what happened. When I finished, I left right away without looking back!

　　After a few days, the doctor told us that we had found a kidney source that matched my mother's and that we could operate right away. After hearing this news, my mother and I were overjoyed. When we asked for the name of the donor, the doctor refused to tell us the name of the kidney donor. He said the person who donated the kidney begged him not to tell.

　　The mother's surgery was very successful and she was discharged from the hospital a month later. Although the doctor did not tell us the name of the kidney donor, my mother and I kept inquiring, not seeking to repay him properly, but at least to know his name!

　　After another month, someone from the court asked my mother to sign, saying that it was some kind of property inheritance signature. Mother went full of doubts. Mother took a look and it turned out that father had given us all his property. Mother was reluctant to sign before, then the court staff gave mother another letter and said to her, "This is what the deceased asked us to make sure to give you before he died, and he said you would sign after reading the letter."

　　"The deceased! The dead ...... person," my mother heard and immediately fainted.

　　When I received the news that my mother had fainted, I immediately rushed to the hospital where she was taken. When I came to the hospital and saw my mother, she was already awake. But my mother had been crying for a long time. When she saw me coming, she asked me to bring the letter to her bag. I listened and immediately took the letter from my bag to her.

　　"Your father is dead, this is the letter he wrote to us, come, we both read it together!" My mother cried and choked up and said to me.

　　I listened, and surprisingly my heart got very sad, and went to my mother and looked at my father's letter. When I finished reading the first paragraph, I really could not imagine this life, it was like a thunderbolt in a clear sky, hitting my heart, hitting my heart hard!

　　My father's letter revealed his unspeakable suffering and truth. The first night my father came home drunk was the night he was diagnosed with terminal stomach cancer. To keep my mother and me from worrying, he wanted to leave us quietly and then die slowly by himself. So he often got drunk and deliberately didn't give his mother and me a good look. But when I saw that my mother was still as good to him as ever, I directed that fake scene of my first love. That night he was not drunk at all, my mother and I smelled his body had a very strong smell of women's perfume the perfume he bought himself sprayed. The purpose was to leave us, not wanting me and my mother to worry. After leaving us, he underwent chemotherapy and lost all his hair, which is why that time I went to him in tears and he was wearing a hat. I hated him so much at the time that I didn't care much about him at all. My mother's kidney was also donated by him. Later, fearing that my mother would not inherit his property, I wrote this letter.

　　After my mother and I finished reading the letter, the two of us had long since cried uncontrollably. My mother held my head, I looked at the tears that fell on the letter, in the tears, I seemed to see my father smiling at us, how I wanted to hold my father with my hands and confess to him, but unfortunately it was all too late......