My Mum Maria

My Mum aka The Boss! (written by Mike Friganiotis)

My Mum, Maria, loved me dearly. Why? I was the first born, so I guess I had privileges. And being the first born son in a Greek family, I was even more special. In our family, when dinner was served by Mum, Dad received his meal first. But when I turned 21, I was first in line!

Up until the age of 5, I only spoke Greek at home. Then I went to school, and learnt to speak and write in English correctly. I was an A grade student, so Mum didn’t have to fuss over me and my schoolwork too much. But she encouraged me to participate in sport. However, football was a no-go area as far as she was concerned (too rough in her eyes) and she bought me a tennis racquet instead. Fail! I never played competitive tennis!

My parents ran a fish and chip shop. And from a young age, I was expected to help. Initially, I was out the back, hand peeling potatoes, and cutting them into chips (or fries if you like). Dad eventually bought a potato peeling machine, so I only had to cut them. Then I progressed to the front counter, serving customers, and cooking the fish and the chips.

I think I learned my social interaction skills there, as it took about 10 minutes or so for the items to be cooked, and I engaged in small talk with the customers to keep them engaged. Mum and Dad had English as their second language, but they coped with the customers, and it was up to me to deal with the tricky questions.

Mum joined the School P & C, and it was her energy that inspired others more than anything. She was more than just a ‘talker’, instead being a ‘doer’. I learned by example, and have always possessed a high energy both at work and home. And Mum was fearless! She never gave up on a task, tackling even the most senior bureaucrats if necessary to resolve a business or personal issue. I could not help but admire her for her tenacity and pursuit of ‘justice’, and in my own life have never allowed myself to be intimidated by anyone.

As I reached adulthood, and entered my career of teaching, Mum’s presence was still there. She continually encouraged me in my work, and supported me when I was sent out bush to a small country school. I would come home every two or three weeks to spend the weekend in the ‘big smoke’, bringing with me a suitcase of clothes that needed washing and ironing. They were always ready and in the suitcase by Sunday night when I left to go back.

Looking back, to Mum, money and other material possessions were not important. It was people that mattered, and above all, family. Her devotion and unfailing support for my father and brother & sister was ongoing, and she was selfless in her actions. Mum was the ‘glue’ that held the family together – Xmas lunch was always held at Mum’s house, with copious food and drink on the table.

You might think she was a pushover when it came to her children getting their own way. But she was firm and purposeful, and was never frightened to explain her views and philosophy on life. Only once did I get a shoe thrown at me for making her irate – and it missed me and hit the TV instead!

I could never lie to her. She would ask a question, and then give me a penetrating stare till I gave her an answer. If I did try to deceive her, I would end up laughing, and she would know I wasn’t telling the truth!

A devout Christian, Mum made us all go to church with her, but as we grew up, she let us make our own choices about our faith. Sometimes, when things weren’t going well, she would ask God why He was being cruel to her.

She has long passed, but my memories of her passionate love for me have endured, and I know that she is still watching over me from above, and guiding me to a life of helping my fellow human beings in whatever way I am able to do so.

As a parent, and now grandparent, I still try to emulate her approach to life, because if I didn’t, the next time, that flying shoe might not miss me!