My Mixed Daughter and Battling Prejudice in the South

I live in the Mississippi, a Southern state. I moved here just about two years ago and it was here I fell in love with my now husband. 5 months ago we had a beautiful baby girl who happens to be mixed. Unfortunately in the South, the color of her skin is the only clear thing about her to most people.

From the moment my husband and I started dating it seemed the most noticeable thing about our relationship was the fact that it was interracial, our skin was a different color. Maybe in other states, seeing an interracial couple is an everyday thing, but here in the South, it is the cause of many stares and judgmental comments, whether intended or not. Early in our relationship I would constantly receive comments from my white friends such as, "wow, he's really cute... for a black guy." Or the most common and probably the most annoying, "He's actually really nice and respectful... for a black guy." These comments shocked me and I just couldn't seem to understand why it was necessary to give a compliment and then follow it up with, "for a black guy." Could they not just pay my boyfriend a normal compliment? If he was white would they say, "he's cute and respectful... for a white guy." Absolutely not.

When I became pregnant the little comments that we began to get used to hearing changed a bit. In stores or restaurants as people saw my pregnant belly popping out with the two of us holding hands, we got strange stares like people had never seen people with different colored skin holding hands. It was almost unfathomable to some people that we could possibly be together. One lady didn't acknowledge my husband as we stood together at the checkout line of a store and said, "Who's the dad?" Maybe it wasn't obvious that we were together, so I try to give her the benefit of a doubt. But I can't help thinking again, "Would she had said that if my husband was white?" I doubt it because what a weird question to ask a complete stranger.

As I reached the end of my pregnancy and was doing final preparations before baby girl came into the world, a close friend of mine asked me a totally unnecessary question. "What will you do if your baby comes out black? Like with dark skin?" I really couldn't believe my ears. My answer was simple. So simple I thought everyone would have thought this way, "I will love her." The color of my baby's skin by the man I love has no meaning and does not in any way define my love for her. A person is their heart and soul and not their appearance. We are all equal.

Now my daughter has been in the world for 5 months. We continue to get stares and these comments. Some bold and obviously racist ones such as, "You know the Bible says not to be unequally yoked, being in an interracial relationship is a sin." Or some annoyances such as, "It's weird that your baby has a different skin color than you." I get angry sometimes I admit and feel especially angered when my husband calmly explains to me that he's always dealt with these people because he's an African American man. He's simply used to it. I will never experience being seen as less than for the color of my skin, but I don't like to see those I love so dearly being seen that way either.

I wonder, will it always be this way? Will my daughter be preyed upon on the school playground for her mom and dad being an interracial couple? Will the color of her skin make other children pick on her? Will she have to fight harder to have the same equal opportunities as white children her whole life? I won't understand these struggles but my heart will ache for her. She will have to be stronger. This is a call to action. We are all human.