My Husband Is Verbally Abusive When He Drinks (How To Live With A Verbally Abusive Alcoholic Husband)

What was it like living with me, the problem drinker? Being involved with an alcoholic is difficult. As a husband and father of several wonderful kids, there was a time when I did a lot of emotional damage to them as a result of my alcoholism. I am thankful today for being sober for over fourteen years now. There has been a wonderment of healing that has taken place in many family relationships.

If you are involved in a dysfunctional relationship with someone who consumes too much alcohol, never give up hope. Problem drinkers live in a world of denial, but at any moment they may hit bottom and seek to get help for their addiction problems.

Since quitting, I've stayed steadily involved in alcoholism support group meetings. My wife never was able to get sober and stay that way though. It was the escalation of her pain-pill addiction, party life and drinking habits.

I'd like to share with you some of the insight that I have gained living with several alcoholics and through reading a lot of literature. These tips will greatly help you in interacting with your alcoholic husband or anyone with this dreadful disease. Please understand, this is just the beginning of thousands of insightful things I've learned about dealing with alcoholic relationships.

One of the first steps to reducing YOUR stress, as it relates to coping with an alcoholic, is to realize that you cannot control their drinking habits. Thinking back, nothing that my wife had done was ever instrumental in making me quit drinking. I finally hit bottom after being drunk one night and getting in a fight with a guy three times my size. The next morning, I realized I had a serious problem and I needed to get help.

Sure, my wife had nagged me about drinking too much. She also confronted me about being in denial. She even threatened to leave me if I didn't stop. Nothing she said or did was instrumental in making me quit.

So, that's why letting go is so important. Let me explain. She would have experienced a lot less frustration and we would have had less arguments, if she would have quit pestering me about how much I was drinking. As a result, she could have had less stress if she had just realized that what she was doing was not working. Instead, every time she would point the finger at me implying what a bad person I was, we would argue and fight.

It's difficult letting go of an alcoholic husband, but it is also necessary. If we continue to do the same things we have always done, we will get the same results that we have always gotten. It is when we change our behaviors that things change for the better.

Realizing that we have no control over the alcoholic is a big change, but it is the beginning of experiencing a lot less pain and frustration.

The key to living happily "with" an alcoholic husband is rediscovering who you are apart from him. As you begin to realize that you cannot control what he is doing, you should start to focus on things you like doing. This is another phase of ending the anxiety, pain and frustration that accompany relationships with problem drinkers.

These few things I've just shared with you are like little baby steps on this subject. There is a road that leads to having a happier and healthier lifestyle, but you must take time to turn down a different street than the one you are on. There are things that you can be doing to make living with an alcoholic husband less stressful.

Effective Ways To Save My Marriage

If you begin questioning how long you'll be together within your relationship, you may be wondering how to conserve my marriage. Keep in mind that a marriage is really a union of a couple, so finding methods to your marriage difficulties is essential.

Here are some tips that will help bring you collectively and increase the likelihood of your marriage enduring:

- No relationship is perfect. In contrast to fairy tales, normal marriages have their own flaws. Do not expect perfection. Believe that there will be protuberances and bumps on the way.

- Marriage demands work. For your romantic relationship to work, the two of you need to recognize that it takes effort to make a relationship strong. The hard work that you put in your marriage can lead to an honest as well as happy relationship. If you don't take this critically, it can be harmful. The areas that typically need the majority of work are trust and respect with each other. Without this stuff, your relationship may fall apart.

- Communicate and pay attention effectively. Create a breeding ground where you can speak to each other without having getting upset. Talk calmly about how you feel and permit your partner to complete the same. Ensure that you listen to what they have to say. It doesn't matter what they say. Talk about how each of you really feels Find mutual understanding where both of you really feel that you can discover solutions for problems you are facing. The greater open and truthful you are with one another, the better.

- Do not obsess with past problems. Don't let past mistakes or even misunderstandings determine the near future of your relationship. While your previous problems may be very serious, dwelling in it will not strengthen your marriage.

- Become more giving to one another. End up being considerate of each other's needs and emotions. If you are uncertain, ask them what you could do to make them pleased. Doing something that can make them feel cherished and special may go a long way in the direction of strengthening your romantic relationship. Sometimes doing the easiest things can mean probably the most to them.

For those who have tried all of the above but still are asking how you can save my relationship, a professional counselor may be your very best option. The decision to visit a counselor must come from both of you because it will not work if you each do not take part fully.

If you are each truly committed to making changes to save your own marriage, a therapist can offer impartial advice to help you. Through getting advice through counselor, it may help you look at your problems inside a different light as well as help you find options.

Do you want to reawaken a committed and loving relationship in your marriage? There are proven steps that are amazingly powerful that will help you overcome conflicts and breathe life back into your marriage. This is a plan you do not want to pass by. Click here to see the proven steps on how to save your marriage.

Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage. To learn more visit: Steps to Save Your Marriage