I love my wife

Romance Sacrifice.

Martin Phillips the perfect example of a man’s man, caught up in something he was frightened of. He was only thirty seven, he had so many other plans. He would like to think that people saw him as a loyal honest man, he certainly tried. Oh, sure he did the big tough job as a builder, he spent four nights a week in the gym, and loved his Saturday night pint. But underneath the exterior there was a family man who loved his wife dearly.

Maddie had always seen beneath his surface she knew what to expect. Martin was a working man caught up in a tough world. But he always put food on the table, put her first and was 100% faithful. He could also be charming and funny underneath them tattoos. To be realistic they had their moments what marriage never. She was 10 years younger than him, and this meant he had lost the respect of his parents and his brother. That was a lot for him to handle, but he stuck to what he wanted which was Maddie. They had not spoken to him since, but he was prepared to make that sacrifice for her. There were no children yet and that was causing tension, unfortunately the age gap was worrying Martin. He wanted to be the doting dad more than anything.

They had met on a night out four years ago and instantly they became inseparable. Martin loved Maddie’s softly spoken voice and kind honest nature. Oh, make no mistake he fancied her straight away, the slim figure, the long blonde curls and the dress sense that made the others look like dustbins. In Maddie’s eyes Martin made her feel safe. From the first night he whisked her away from the loud crowd they were with, took her soft smooth hand and led her somewhere much quieter. Here he made sure she was comfortable and spent the evening listening to her rather than trying to pull her.

Maddie looked at Martin lying there he looked so lost and vulnerable. He looked like he had aged ten years suddenly, and his strong authoritative voice was no more than a whisper. With the smells of bleach and disinfectant and the look of all those worried frightened faces Maddie wished she could be a million miles away. It was her first experience of a hospital and she was terrified. But, this was not about her, it was about Martin the man she loved. Why had she neglected him? Was she really so heartless? From what she could gather her husband had had a heart attack. The upshot been he would need urgent heart surgery. The very words had made Maddie violently sick. They must have got it wrong.

Martin lay there in a state of shock. He was vaguely aware of Maddie’s presence. He could hear her calming voice, feel her soft skin, even smell the perfume she was wearing. He may not be aware of too much but Martin sure as hell needed her there. He had tried telling her he loved her, but he was so very weak that he did not think she could hear him. He could tell she was talking to him but none of it made any sense, that did not matter she was trying. Just been able to hold her hand and feel there wedding ring made everything seem more normal somehow. He was in agony, worse pain than he could ever imagine. His heart felt like it was exploding in his chest, also all the tubes and wires meant he could not move an inch. He had an oxygen mask to help his breathing, it felt even worse. He just hoped they knew what they were doing. To place your life, and your trust in the hands of someone you had never met was surreal. To think he had not even had the chance to think about it. He could not remember how long ago, but the last thing he could remember was eating a slice of toast. He remembered having a stinking headache, like a hangover but with no alcohol. Martin did not know if they realised, but when they explained what was going to happen, he understood every word. He would not have had it any other way, if there was any doubt at all he was out of there.

Martin lay motionless. He could hear the late night revellers making there way home without a care in the world. He could see and feel the cold dark night starting to take it’s hold. The life support machines including his own continually bleeping, and the cries of pain from people who deserved a better life. Whether it was the new painkillers or pure exhaustion, but Martin started to drift off to sleep.

He was conscious of voices calling him and pulling him towards them. He was floating above looking down on the hospital as it carried on unaware. Poor Martin was caught up in something he did not expect. Or understand!!! He was overcome by bright lights and warm lovely sunshine. There were beautiful smells and colours all mixed with a feeling of calm. It was like nothing Martin had ever experienced before. It was all so magical and alive, the sort of place the mind takes you to when you let it explore. He could hear music and voices singing, whilst all the time the poor man looked down on the hospital with all its sadness and despair. You could feel the contrasts between hope and despair or life and death. Martin got the over riding feeling that someone was trying to make a point. Martin felt calmer and more relaxed than he had in a long time, his chest pains had gone and he could move around freely. In front of him appeared an elf he sat on a rock and introduced himself. His name was Mac and he automatically knew Martin’s. This was getting silly now and Martin wished this dream would end. How could anyone feel threatened by a mythical creature? It was a dream brought on by all the medication he was taking.

“So how are you feeling” asked Mac. “You’ve had quite a day of it”

Without explanation, Martin started to engage in conversation.

“Not so bad. Quite a place you have here. Now what the hell is going on”?

Mac smiled “I am sorry it’s just this place is so beautiful. I sometimes forget how intimidating it can be”. “come with me”

Mac took Martin by the hand and led him into a forest. By now Martin was getting really spooked. What the hell was all this about? And why was he so relaxed about it? Bats flew overhead, Fairies wished them a good day, and everywhere elves ran about doing various jobs. But this was not really the incredible thing. Throughout their journey through the woods Martin was given a reminder of his life so far. He saw his parents holding him when he had just been born. It struck Martin how much he looked like his father. There was an image of Martin in his school uniform when he was around eight. There was a group of children laughing and calling him names. Martin has forgotten how upset he was, but then there was another image of him and his father with boxing gloves on. Martin remembered as clear as day now, how good it had felt to ditch this bully on his backside with his nose bleeding. Martin could hear voices he remembered and ones he did not. But each one carried a special memory. There were images of him and his grandfather swimming and fishing. Such happy times. As he grew older Martin saw and heard the voice of his first girlfriend urging him to fight for what be believed. He had forgotten just how much he loved this young lady. She had broken his heart. And left him with a massive chip on his shoulder. Then his wedding day Maddie looked stunning, even more so than he remembered. But wait…. who was that lurking around in the background. Martin knew instantly it was his parents. Despite everything they had said, they could not miss their son’s wedding. Martin felt a tear, all these years of hurt because everyone was too stubborn to make the first move.

“You all right there big man said the little elf. Something in your eye”? “Come and sit next to me this is important”. “Now then” he began “Who, is the most important person in your life”

My wife Maddie of course. Martin replied but then I guess you knew that.

Mac grinned and gave a little dance. “Excellent” he shouted. “Now look in that big cloud and watch”

Martin saw some images of Maddie and himself. They looked older and much frailer. Martin was hobbling around moving slowly, whilst Maddie held his arm the whole way. They lived in a shabby little house that needed decorating and the garden sorting. Maddie was doing her best to hold it all together but all Martin could do was sleep. It really was no life at all. For either of them.

“Shocked by that” asked Mac. That is you and Maddie in five years if your operation works. You obviously can not work, you can hardly stand. So, there is no money. There will never be any children. All Maddie will ever be is your carer. Even as you get gradually worse. The arguments and the shouting will tear you both apart. Its your medication and your memories of tomorrows operation. You never recover, the sad thing is you will drag Maddie down with you. The name calling and the threats are disgusting. But they happen anyway. But she loves you and will never complain. She will argue she is your wife for better for worse.

Now watch this. With some sacrifice. This time Maddie looked happy and at ease with life. There was a lovely home, two children and a new man in her life. There were images of holidays and a whole host of happy times. Even a third child. Maddie’s job had really taken off she was a natural teacher she always had been.

“What do you say to that Martin”. The little elf magically jumped from his seat and landed right next to Martin. Can you see the difference in your wife’s happiness? Her whole life has been changed. She is a young, beautiful woman with her whole life before her. There are no long term worries about caring for a man who is getting worse slowly, but who she loves deeply. No hospital visits for check-ups or ever-increasing operations. And most importantly!! no sadness and despair for this remarkable woman, when the marriage turns to regrets, sadness and ultimately resentment. Just think by making the ultimate sacrifice, you can give this woman you love a better happier life. Come and join us in our wonderful pain free garden of tranquillity. And rest assured you will be watching and guiding Maddie every inch of the way. You will be making sure she is happy. Every star that twinkles, every leaf that falls will carry your memory and your careful guiding eye.

We are going to send you back now Martin you have a couple of hours to choose the path you want to take. Its not easy so be careful. Are you ready for the ultimate sacrifice for this woman you love so much?

I am sorry to tell you that Martin never came round after the operation.