I Didn't Have The Average Mom

I know you are expecting a story about how my amazing mother influenced and raised me but this won’t be exactly that. Yes, my mom did influence me but to go in the opposite direction as her. I will give you a brief background before I fill in the blanks. My sister was born shortly after I turned 2 years old and just a few months after her birth my mom gave both my sister and I to my dad to be raised. She did this because she was 18 years old, not ready to be a mother, and wanted to experience and enjoy her life.

My mother easily and legally gave up her parental rights and disappeared. We would hear from her just a few times throughout the year, hope that she remembered our birthdays, and would be utterly embarrassed if she attended family and school functions. The embarrassment came from her drug habit. My mother has been a heavy drug user, in and out of prison, and until this day-unstable. There are periods of time when she seems “okay” and during those periods is when I allow her to be a part of mine and my kid’s lives. Her moral values were never in the right place, but I pray for her and I am thankful that I am even here because of her.

Just because this was my situation it does not mean that I did not learn great things from her. I learned how to be emotionally strong, how to say “NO” to negative influences, and most of all how to be an AMAZING mother so that my children never have to feel how I have felt growing up. I vowed to myself to be the opposite of her. I will attend every show my kids have, every conference, allow them a normal and happy social life, and most of all TLC 24/7. Yes, my choices both personal and professional were shaped by her in more ways than you can imagine. Knowing who I DIDN’T want to be is the most powerful part of my story.

This challenge is called the “Boss Mom” challenge and I entered it because without a doubt I am a boss mom. I have defied generational curses and barriers. I am on the path to earning my Master’s Degree and I am a teacher. I work everyday doing something that I am absolutely passionate about and love. I am 100% present in my children’s lives, and I assure them how much they are loved and appreciated. I have high expectations for them to go to college and succeed in so many ways. I am pre-approved for my first mortgage, and I can say that I am eternally happy. I am honoring myself as a #BossMom because I really came far, given my childhood.

I was blessed with other leading ladies in my life. I had two grandmothers and an aunt growing up who were able to give me a great example of what a woman was to be. A huge part of my ambitions and success is due to those women who didn’t even birth me but chose to be a part of the village that raised me.

One thing that I would like to note is a lesson that my father had taught me growing up- strong mindedness. My father taught me that part of being a boss in life was being making the best decisions that I could and being as stern as I want to when it comes to my wants, needs, and goals. He taught me to fight through pain and emotion. He taught me that as a woman in this world I will have to fight harder than most men and many other women to get to the top. I have done that and finally all of my clawing to the top is paying off because I am almost there. If this is not a boss mom then what is?