How's it going?

　　You are 60 years old and still busy with your children, aren't you tired? Is it, really tired? Tired, come to my home, see my 10 years of struggle outside, see I finally have a nest of their own. This nest is also yours, because without you where there is me?

　　These days, I keep dreaming that you are suddenly gone, not even letting me call.

　　Together, I do not know what to say to you, I told you that I am now living quite well, can live in a city, do not starve myself, but you said to help your sister with it. You also said that in old age, to let me support you because living in a daughter's house is not the same thing.

　　By now, I can't guess what you're thinking and what you want.

　　For me, I may want a lot, money, power, luxury life, and some spiritual aspects of the pursuit of all kinds. But you, what do you want? And what do I want to do?

　　I'm really afraid that I won't have the chance to hear you say what you want and what you are seeking.

　　I am from the countryside, now rooted in the city. You, from the countryside, are now working in the big city for your daughter.

　　A "life", a "part-time job", the difference is really big.

　　Several times I said, "Stop working, come to my place to retire. You said that you couldn't worry about your sister and brother-in-law and needed you. If you leave them, they have no way to live. But how do you know that everyone has a destiny, and there are things that you can't help, and you should understand that you can't help for a lifetime? The important thing is, I don't think I understand what you are helping them with.

　　You know what you are like, that you are uneducated, that you are incapable, that you have no money. People in the village say that you are honest, brainless, and do not walk the talk. But what does it look like to have a brain and what does it look like to have no brain?

　　I want to drink with you and ask you. However, I know I won't be able to do this at all, and I can't open my mouth. Because of the discovery: now, you are strange to me.

　　I can't remember the sweetness you gave me since I was a child. Maybe for people of your age, what sweetness, it was a success to raise me to adulthood. I have the most memorable time when you bought a box of cookies left to sell, but I ate them all by myself, you did not hit me, but secretly asked me if they were good. I saw the satisfaction and pride on your face you did as a father.

　　I can't choose you, and you can't choose me either.

　　The world has too many things I see through, the world I have too many do not understand, the world I have too many desires and temptations, between men and men, I want to sit down together to talk, but I know that it is impossible, life is not a movie, life is not a TV show.

　　I want to talk about my work, I want to talk about how to earn money, but you simply can not understand how a computer earns more than what you earn in a lifetime.

　　You also can't understand that when I negotiate with foreigners, my pressure, my meandering, my skills, my helplessness ......

　　Yes, how can you understand this modern society if you can only write your name?

　　You don't understand me, just like I don't understand you either.

　　Dad, am I your pride and joy?

　　Dad, do you know that I am hating you sometimes? Dad, do you also know that I sometimes really miss you? Just want to, quietly, stand behind me and tell me that everything will pass and everything will be okay. But, I know you won't. You are caring for me in your way, what way is it, is a kind of people like me who think they know a few words is not understand.

　　Sometimes, I'm so tired, I'm so annoyed, just say I'm not going to get married ...... you just say, so old should get married, you also say you will not rush me ...... mouth asked, but also said not to rush me ... ...

　　I can't say that I can't get married because I don't have feelings for the opposite sex, because by saying that you wouldn't understand, I'm sure you wouldn't understand.

　　Dad, am I your pride and joy?

　　Dad, do you know how much I miss you sometimes? Dad, do you also know that I hate you sometimes? I would love to have a drink and talk about my job, my stress, my journey since I left home in high school, and my helplessness and incompetence.

　　Did I ask you to come to the south in winter? Because the day in the northeast is very cold and cold. Did I ask you, in the end, I should open the fight themselves to love well? I ask you, in my most difficult time, I can cry to you. These can only be in a dream, can only be in a dream.

　　Dad, if there is an afterlife, don't let us be father and son, okay? Let's be brothers, I'm an older brother, let me always take care of you, you're stupid or smart, I understand you or I don't understand you, I will give you the strength to move forward.

　　Dad, who do you think will leave this world first, the two of us? Is it you? No, so I have even less to rely on and even fewer people to complain to. Will it be me? If I go, will you grow old quickly? Although you are much, much older now.

　　ok, let me go first. I'm afraid that, in a few years, I won't let you be proud, what then? After I'm gone, how much cost of living will I leave behind to make me feel at ease when I go, 100,000, 1 million?

　　Are you doing well, Dad?

　　On my own, am I doing well?