Ghost Writer

Anna gathered up her notebooks and laptop shoving them into her messenger bag.

", could you stay for a moment after class?" Professor Lolita asked, not giving the young woman a chance to escape. Anna didn't have time for this, she desperately needed to get to work. She knew she shouldn't have taken a class so late in the day but the one of Lolita's that was going to fit into her schedule, and she couldn't pass up the opportunity.

"Yes, Professor?" Anna said as the other students made their way out the door.

"I know you're in a hurry, but this is important. You are a talented writer, , I know that you are but your work is suffering of late."

"I know, I have a lot going on right now."

"I'm aware, this year has been a struggle for you in more ways than one but you have to focus. We're in the home stretch now, writing could be your future."

"I want it to be, it's hard right now." Anna explained, as she held back the tears that threatened to flow. She did not want to deal with this right now.

Noticing how close her adopted niece was to losing it Lolita shifted. "I have something for you", she said reaching into her bag to pull out a small package wrapped in brown paper and a shiny gold bow. "I was supposed to wait for your birthday but I think you could use it now, it's from your mother."

Anna gasped and started shaking her head no, "I don't want it, she should have given it to me herself." She said her voice breaking as the tears began to stream.

"She lied to me too, Anna, but one day you're going to have to forgive her and when you do you'll have this"

"You had to have known something for her to have given this to you! You had to have noticed when you saw her!"

"It came in the mail a week after the funeral. "

Anna stared at her mothers best friend in utter shock. How could her mother do this to either of them. Did she think at all about how they'd feel, how this would affect them, did she even care?

"She did what she thought was the best Anna. I know its hard, believe me, I do, but she did her best. Please take it." she said holding the package out towards Anna.

"She could have done better," she said taking the package and shoving it in her bag, before turning away and rushing to the door.

"I miss her too, Anna" Lolita said, her eyes beginning to water.

Anna paused at the door for a moment "I know," she whispered. Then she was .

Anna sat down at the kitchen table that evening after work to start on homework. She finished most of what needed to be but there were still a assignments that needed her attention, but they weren't due till Monday. Anna could work on it the next morning. She typically worked Saturdays, but she had the day off for her birthday. She would have preferred to spend the morning reading with a steaming cup of coffee, but she was exhausted. As she started to pack everything back into her bag, she noticed the little brown package. She pulled it out of her bag and stared at it for a moment her thoughts racing through the events of the last months. The call from her mothers doctor, the funeral arrangements, the black dress she threw away the evening of the funeral. She wanted her mom back. She never even got a chance to say goodbye. Tossing the package onto the table, she got up to get ready for bed.

As she meandered about her small studio apartment, changing into pajamas, and turning down the bed she kept glancing at the package on the table. She thought to herself how ridiculous that she was almost scared to open it. The worst had already happened. Her mother was dead, there was nothing that would bring her back or make it better, but there was nothing that could make it worse either. That was it, she was opening it. Leaving it there, unopened on the table would bring her more anxiety and make her day to day that much harder. Better to get it over with.

She slipped her finger under the wrapping, peeling it off to reveal a little black book. When she opened the front cover, two envelopes slipped out. One said "read me first" in her mothers handwriting, the other looked blank. She opened the first envelope and pulled out a map and a letter. She set the map to the side and unfolded the letter.

Hi ,

Happy Birthday! Even thought you are a grown woman remember you will always be my baby. I am so sorry that we have to celebrate your 25th birthday this way, I wish more than anything I could be there to see your beautiful smiling face, but I don't have long left now. You've grown into an exceptional young woman and I could not be more proud.

I know that you're probably angry with me for not telling you the cancer came back. I had my reasons and I promise I'll explain them but first I have something I need you to do for me. The map I included in this envelope will lead you to a special place. Once you get there, you can open the second envelope.

There's nothing stopping you from opening that second letter right now and ignoring this one , but I am hoping that you'll respect my dying wish. The magic won't work otherwise. Please let me leave a little birthday magic for you . Trust me.

I love you sweet girl.

P.S. bring the notebook.

Anna wiped the tears from her cheeks, she hadn't even realized she'd been crying. She didn't have to look at the map to know where her mom wanted her to go. All exhaustion forgotten she grabbed the notebook, letters and her keys and headed for their spot.

When Anna was a little girl, she and her mom found a small pond tucked away half a mile off of the walking trail at their favorite park. It became their place. Sometimes they'd have picnics there sometimes they'd bring their fishing poles and throw out a line. though, they'd go there to talk. Whenever Anna needed to talk, her mother would take her there and listen. That spot had gotten her through every argument with friends, every bully, and every break-up. She would bear her soul to her mom under the big tree closest to the water. The sounds of the birds chirping and the water rippling under the force of the wind. peaceful and no matter what was tearing her apart inside talking to her mother there always put her back together. She hadn't been back since her mom was diagnosed with cancer the first time, until now.

Anna pulled up to the entrance of the park nearly four hours later. still in the morning and there was no one else around. She gathered everything into the notebook before starting the trek up to the pond. Once she broke away from the trail, it hit her this was the first time she'd walked this path without her mother. She would never get to walk with her mother again, never cry her worries away into her shoulder, never shop together for her wedding dress. A whole list of never's began running through her mind and she couldn't breathe. She stopped at the tree line before hitting the pond to try to catch her breath. This had to be far enough, she didn't know if she could go any farther. This was too painful. Anna pulled the second letter from the notebook and opened it there.

Sweet Annalise,

You're almost there. If I know my baby girl, I know you've almost made it but you stopped short of reaching our spot. a little further. Go to our spot and you should find a small shovel. Dig a little deeper baby, you can do this. I'm right here with you.

I love you.

Anna took a deep breaths, and stood up. She made her way to their spot and saw the trowel her mother was talking about sitting atop a pile of loose dirt. Anna began digging and it wasn't long before she reached the wooden box buried there. Taped to the top of the box inside a sandwich bag was another envelope. She ripped into it, looking for the answers her mother had promised.

You did it!

I am so proud of you. I know this is hard and probably felt a little morbid, but cancer ruined my original plan for your 25th birthday. had to improvise. Please don't be too angry for too long, embrace this of magic.

It may take a while for you to forgive me for keeping my illness from you, but I need you to understand I had good reason. Watching you pull yourself away from school and your friends to come and take care of me was the worst part of being sick. You were doing so well and my diagnosis set you back a years on your education. Losing your scholarships and had to taking on more work and more hours to help us get by. You did all that without once complaining, but I saw your worry, I saw your fear and it broke my heart. I couldn't do that to you again. You are so close to earning your degree and I know you would have dropped everything to take care of me, but it's progressed too far. nothing you could do, but you can finish school. You can go on to do baby girl, and I will be there every step of the way.

How you ask? Well, the second part of your gift is in this box but the first gift, the notebook is the more important one. Whenever you miss me, whenever you need me come back to our spot and write down everything you need to tell me. I promise, I'll be listening.

Now open the rest of your present, and tell me what you think!

I love you , forever and .

Anna was bawling now, but she opened the box and inside was a pen and a check from a life insurance company for twenty- thousand dollars. The memo line read "for whatever your heart desires, but I know you'll use it for school." Anna chuckled through her tears, her mother knew her well. She pulled out the little black notebook and flipped to the first page. She pulled the pen from the box and wrote, " I miss you, . much."

, words appeared under hers on the page, in her mothers familiar script. "I know , I miss you too."

Anna gaped at the page for a moment, not believing her eyes. she scribbled one word "How?"

"Didn't I say I'd leave you with a little magic?"