conversations in the car

"I don't have time."

We spend so much time talking about time that we waste more time by talking about how little time we have.

I have been a high school English teacher for 22 years -- and in the last two years, I've had the privilege of driving my daughter to attend my high school. Going to school together has been absolutely amazing.

Both before and after school, Kayden and I have at least 25 minutes of time when she is basically “stuck” with me. I need to use that time to my advantage - she only has a few more years until she leaves for college.

It’s strange in an amazing way that I never expected. In that enclosed space, Kayden is often more willing to talk about things. She’s in a safe space. No one else can hear her and she has her mother’s undivided attention because I am stuck behind the wheel.

That’s how Conversations in the Car was born. I decided to develop lists of weekly questions I want to ask Kayden that create a space for open and organic conversation. I want to be intentional with our time – and that means being intentional with my preparation for that time. I wanted to capitalize on those 25 minutes of opportunity to know her better.

As a teacher, I thought it would be great not only to create these conversations for my daughter and I, but also to share the conversation starters with parents and other educators who are looking for resources to share with the families of their students.

Sometimes I think we just "assume" people know how to talk with their kids - especially as they hit middle school. There are so many emotions and rollercoaster experiences that make communication difficult. But for some reason, the car just is OUR place. The place where secrets happen. And I want to embrace that reality and make it special.

Download the ebook below (for free!) and decide if you’d like to join us on this intentional adventure to grow closer together. I want to KNOW my daughter and her heart. Maybe some days we’ll start with the question I prepared – and maybe it will lead us somewhere entirely different. But I know that I love her very much and this decision is an intentional way to show her how much. We need to talk with our kids!

The free ebook has one month of daily questions that dive into four topics. These topics (favorites, friendship, gratitude, and feelings) provide open doors for other conversations. There are specific daily prompts outlined under each category. For instance, here is a sample of one of the ebook weekly pages:

These conversations don't have to be limited to children or teenagers. Sometimes we as adults don't know how to talk to each other. Maybe you commute to work every day with some co-workers and find the silence deafening. Maybe you eat lunch in the workroom and you aren't sure how to strike up a conversation. Maybe you're trying to get to know someone who lives across the hall. Grab these free questions and start up the conversation anywhere -- the water cooler, the hallway, the copy machine.

We need more human connection - especially since we've been quarantined and socially distanced. If you are still working from home, use one of the questions as an ice breaker for your next Zoom call. But allow the conversation to give you something we all long for --- relationship.

Honestly? I don't know what I'm going to do when Kayden goes to college and my car is empty. She might just be getting early morning calls every day.

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DOWNLOAD One Month of Conversations in the Car HERE

If you need more ideas for fun adventures to try with your kids, try a Pop Up Positivity Picnic (see video below)!