Becky

It was 3am. Becky was still asleep in her bed, wrapped in threadbare pajamas and throw

blankets of varying states of faded. It was cold, but she was warm. The room was dark, minus

the occasional swirl of yellow as a car passed by. The loud noises hadn’t woken her yet. They

would though, they always did.

“Becky. Becky, wake up, sweetie.” A ray of light hit Becky’s eyes as they opened, blurring

her vision. She knew the voice though. “Mommy?” She replied.

“Come on sweetie. Come on, we’ve got to go.” Becky felt arms slide under her and

reached instinctively for support. She buried her face in her mother’s neck and tightened her

arms around her. She knew what came next.

“I don’t think so!” A voice roared from seemingly everywhere. Another burst of light,

much unkinder than the last, and the noises began bouncing around her head. Becky shut her

eyes tightly and covered her ears. She felt herself moving and knew the path without looking.

Out of her bedroom, down the hall, straight through the doorway and outside. They didn’t make

it outside. Somewhere between the hall and the door and the words she knew you weren’t

supposed to say to people, they had stopped and turned around.

Suddenly, she felt herself swinging and heard a scream that matched her own. She tried

to reach for something to grab on to, to stop herself, but her desperate hands caught nothing

and she landed flat on the ground, face first. She bit her lip and tried not to cry. That only made

it worse. Her lip hurt though, and it tasted funny. Blood. It tasted like the time she lost a tooth.

Unable to help it, she cried. The noises became louder.

She felt herself get picked up and buried her face again. Her arms and legs wrapped

tightly around anything they could find. She heard the familiar woosh of the door , barely audible

under another round of angry words, and it slammed behind them. She let her breath out. It was

okay.

After a few moments, Becky picked her head up and looked around. They were walking

towards the park. That seemed fun. She had been dreaming so nicely in her bed, and although

this was colder and not quite the same, it could be fun. Maybe they would go to the park.

“Becky. I’m so sorry sweetie. Mommy is sorry. She didn’t mean for this to happen again.”

Becky kissed her mother’s cheek. “It’s okay, mommy.” she whispered. She didn’t like to hear

anyone sad.

“Would you like to play for a little bit?” Becky nodded. She had never been to the park in

the dark before. Usually when this happened they went to a diner not too far away and got ice

cream or cake. Those were fun times. They started off very scary, but they couldn’t be too bad if

they ended with ice cream. Right?

Off to the park they went. No one was playing on anything, and Becky felt like the queen

of the world not having to wait, take turns, or share. She went high on the swing, went down

(and up!) the slide as many times as she wanted. She played in the sandbox, and no one

knocked over her castle. She was, however, very very cold. Playing seemed to help. As the sun

rose, Becky became tired. She looked over at her mother, who had been sitting, smiling

supportively at her from a bench most of the time. She was asleep. Becky sat next to her and

pulled a long arm around her. It’s not a nap, she thought, if no one knows about it.

She woke up a short time later to the sound of a male voice. She did not recognize it, but

recognized her mother instantly. She was apologizing.

“I’m so sorry, officer. We had a rough night at home, and just went for a walk for a little

bit. We must have dozed off. Again, I am so sorry.”

“That’s alright, miss.” The voice replied sympathetically. “But it’s cold, it’s barely light, and

the child doesn’t have much on. It’s time to go inside. I can give you a lift, if you tell me where

you’re going. If it’s safe.”

“Oh, that would be great. It’s safe. Plenty safe. It was a one off. No biggie. Honestly.” Her

mother replied. Becky didn’t know what a one off was, but she didn’t think her mom was telling

the truth. She sat up.

“Hi there, young lady.” A man in a blue uniform squatted down in front of Becky and

smiled at her. “How are you?” he asked softly. Becky rubbed her eyes and frowned. She didn’t

know. The office smiled. “Sleepy?” he asked. She nodded and looked to her mother. “Well, let’s

get you home.”

Becky’s mother scooped her up and they followed the officer to his squad car. “Sorry.

Protocol.” he said sheepishly as he opened the back door for them.

“No worries. I’m just happy for the help. Again, I am so sorry. This never happens.”

Maybe Becky wondered to herself , she meant going to the park in the dark. They went other

places in the dark a lot. Suddenly, Becky wanted ice cream. She looked over at her mother, who

was watching her. Her mother reached for the door handle, and made a dramatically shocked

face when the door didn’t open. “We’re trapped!” Becky giggled. The officer got in.

They arrived home a few moments later and Becky’s mother thanked the officer again.

They went upstairs. Inside, Becky’ s father was asleep on the couch. Becky’s mother carried her

to her room and sat her on her bed, wrapping a throw around her. “Are you hungry?” she asked

quietly. Becky shook her head. She was tired. Even her stomach was tired. Her mother smiled.

“Not even for...ice cream?” Becky smiled back. “Maybe. Maybe just a little.” Becky was asleep

when her mother returned with two bowls of ice cream with chocolate syrup. Her mother woke

her and Becky sat sleepily up. She ate her ice cream, fighting to keep her eyes open. They were

heavy. “Is yours okay?” She asked her mother, who’s ice cream was untouched.

“Oh it’s fine, sweetie. I’m just not really hungry. Say, would you like mine too?” She

smiled brightly and took Becky’s empty bowl, placing her own back into Becky’s hand. Becky,

exhausted, but happy, ate her mother’s ice cream too. Afterwards, with a belly that was much,

much too full, she fell asleep in her bed. “Tomorrow” she heard her mother whisper as she

dozed off. “Tomorrow will be better.” She had fallen asleep to those words before.