Admissions, Expectations, and a Backpack Full of Stress

*“Just get through 10th grade, and life will be easy,” they said.*

Then came: “12th grade is the real challenge, after that smooth sailing.”

Now here I am three months deep into entrance exams, my brain fried, my wallet empty from test fees, and my future blurry like a rainy windshield.

Welcome to the great South Asian dream: *Get a degree with 'scope', land a job, and make your parents proud.*

But in reality? It's more like surviving an emotional rollercoaster with no seatbelt.

It’s funny how students are sold this dream of a smooth academic journey. After every milestone, we’re promised relaxation, joy, and freedom. But that freedom never comes. It’s always postponed to the next phase and the next and the next.

After completing my 12th grade (intermediate education), I stepped into the chaotic battlefield of university admissions. I wasn't chasing just education. I was chasing respect, societal validation, and a future I wasn’t even sure I wanted.

In my country, the trend or let’s call it obsession is with Computer Science. Why? Because it has ‘scope’. Everyone is running toward it like it’s the only key to a successful life. Students who once dreamed of becoming doctors, artists, or anything else are now scrambling for a seat in Computer Science just because “it pays well.”

And guess what that’s done to the competition? It’s pushed the merit so high, even the smartest students are struggling. I’ve already appeared in 5 to 6 entrance exams of different universities, and still, the hope of getting into a good one feels like reaching for the stars with bare hands.

Sometimes I sit back and laugh at how they used to tell us:

“Once you complete school, you’ll be free.”

Then: “Just finish college, then you’ll have time to live.”

Now it’s: “Secure admission into a good university that’s when real life begins.”

But the truth is, real life began the moment we started sacrificing our dreams to fit into what society and parents think is ‘successful.’

And the funniest part? Most of us don’t even know if we want to do this. Honestly, I don’t even feel like studying anymore. Deep down, I want to start my own business something of my own. But dreams cost money, and guess what? I don’t have it.

Private universities are too expensive. Government ones have sky-high merit. And we, the lower-middle-class students, are caught between ambition and affordability. We can’t pay millions, but we want to make millions.

My mind keeps wandering. What if I could just skip this whole thing? What if I could fast-forward to the part where I’m financially stable, mentally peaceful, and proud of what I do?

But then, motivation kicks in. That tiny voice whispers:

“If you don’t make something of yourself, what’s the point of even existing?”

So I fight. I study. I apply. I hustle. Even when I know the system is flawed. Even when rejection feels personal. Even when the weight of expectations becomes unbearable.

There are days I think, “Forget everything. Let my parents take care of me. What’s the rush?”

But then I remind myself if I don’t work hard now, I’ll regret it forever. Because I believe:

*Becoming a good human being is already a blessing everything else is a bonus.*

I’ve met students who shifted from Biology to Computer Science not because they wanted to, but because that’s where the ‘scope’ was. Others who gave up on scholarships because they couldn’t afford relocation. And many like me stuck between dreams and entrance exams.

Sometimes I feel like education isn’t a path to knowledge anymore. It’s a battlefield. You’re not here to learn; you’re here to win. And if you don’t win no matter how talented or passionate you are you’re sidelined.

And while everyone keeps telling you, “It’ll be worth it in the end,” you can’t help but wonder what if it’s not? What if, after all this pain, you end up in a job you don’t love, in a life that doesn’t fulfill you?

Still, we move forward. Because we hope. Because we believe that even a broken system can’t stop a determined soul. Because we want to prove to ourselves and to the world that we’re more than just statistics.

To the students who failed entrance exams, who didn’t get scholarships, who couldn’t afford private universities your story isn’t over. Your story is just different. And it’s still valid. Don’t let a broken system define your worth.

And to the parents reading this please, listen. Your kids aren’t lazy. They’re tired. They’re trying. Support them. Encourage them. Ask them what they want not what the market wants. Because a child doing what they love will always go further than one doing what they hate, just to please you.

To every reader who has ever struggled with admissions, expectations, and the never-ending pressure to “do something great” you’re already great for surviving this far. You’re already strong for trying one more time.

So next time someone says, “Just clear this one phase, and then you’ll enjoy,” smile politely. But know the truth:

*Life isn’t about waiting to live. Life is about living, even when the odds are against you.*