Hidden from your school syllabus, yet vital for your 2023 ambitions: Negotiation & Influence

1. MIRRORING:

Why it works: Humans are inherently drawn to familiarity. When we recognize a part of ourselves in others, trust is built.

What it is: Simply repeat the last 3 words someone just said.

How to use it: Use it subtly during conversations. It not only builds rapport but encourages the other person to elaborate, giving you more insight.

Example:

Client: “We need more features.”

You: “More features?”

Client: “Yes, specifically, features like X, Y, and Z.”

2. LABELING:

Why it works: Everyone wants to feel understood. By voicing out their emotions, you’re showing empathy.

What it is: It’s the act of naming someone’s emotion or perspective.

How to use it: Listen actively. Then, reflect their feelings back to them.

Example:

Partner: “This new policy is restricting.”

You: “Sounds like you feel trapped with this new approach.”

3. ACCUSATION AUDIT:

Why it works: By addressing concerns proactively, you’re showing that you’re steps ahead, building confidence in your stance.

What it is: It’s preemptively addressing objections.

How to use it: Before someone brings up a potential issue, address it.

Example:

Before pitching: “I know you might think our product is pricey, but here’s why it’s worth every penny…”

4. COMMITMENT & CONSISTENCY:

Why it works: Psychologically, once we commit to something, even if minor, we like to stay consistent with our choices.

What it is: It’s based on Cialdini’s Principle of getting someone to agree to a smaller ask first.

How to use it: Start with a minor request before transitioning to a larger one.

Example:

Ask a client for a minor commitment before a major one. If they agree to a small trial, they’re likelier to take up a bigger package.

5. THE POWER OF “NO”:

Why it works: Saying ‘No’ gives a person a sense of control. It’s empowering.

What it is: It’s about framing questions where the answer can be ‘No’.

How to use it: Instead of seeking agreement, sometimes, it’s more powerful to let the other person disagree.

Example:

Instead of: “Do you agree?”, ask “Do you disagree?”

6. SOCIAL PROOF:

Why it works: We’re social creatures. We look to others, especially majorities, to guide our decisions.

What it is: Demonstrating that others, especially respected figures or the majority, are taking a particular action.

How to use it: Use statistics, testimonials, or endorsements.

Example:

“9 out of 10 industry leaders have adopted this software for optimizing their workflow.”

7. SCARCITY:

Why it works: The fear of missing out is a powerful motivator. We value things more when we believe they’re in short supply.

What it is: Highlighting the uniqueness and limited availability of your offer.

How to use it: Emphasize the exclusivity and potential loss.

Example:

“This is a limited-time strategy that only a few businesses are privy to.”

In the intricate dance of negotiation and influence, understanding the psychology behind these tactics is key.

They aren’t just tricks but are rooted in deep human behavior and desires.

By mastering them, you’re not just becoming a better negotiator or influencer; you’re becoming a better communicator.

Recommended arsenal for the serious negotiator:

“Never Split the Difference” by Chris Voss

“Influence” by Robert Cialdini

TL;DR:

Negotiation and Influence are two sides of the same coin. Dive deep into the psychology behind them, and the world truly becomes your oyster.