Word of the day: 懐かしい

Yesterday I cried quite a bit but it was good tears, I was thinking of Jahon and how we both really fucked up our situation. We both were just high all the time and it was pretty toxic, but I do still feel connected to him too, spiritually. But I feel like it is such a far past for me, or my current circumstances are so odd. I don't know what to expect from anything anymore.

I am running into issues writing my next Jail Journal because I wrote like 2 pages of it in Japanese because I didn't want my bunkmates knowing what is up with me, and I can't submit too much Japanese on Vocal otherwise they deny the submission.

It makes me a bit sad because I am not considering just migrating to Medium instead of here since they are more lenient on the languages used and I really am looking for a one stop shop for all my writing.

I thought it was going to be Vocal since it seems like a nice little community and it isn't as saturated but, now I see why that is the case.

I can't continue to write in a space that is xenophobic and won't allow for more freedom with writing, I need to consider what sort of content I want to create and what tools are useful for that.

I did have some good news, though I lost 2 clients the other day with art, someone contacted me for English tutoring!

I haven't done anything like that in such a long time so I am not sure how I will be able do it but since on Super Prof, the first lesson is free, I am not too worried about teaching or anything like that. I am just going to make some simple pamphlet papers with some though provoking questions and sort of end it with, " If you want to continue lessons, feel free to book it on Super Prof again~ "

I am also not sure if I want to continue my Jail Journal here or if I need to prepare for it to be moved to Medium instead. I am smack dab in the middle of it so it is kind of akward to change in anyway.

I guess I will keep writing it here, then import it to Medium, and delete it from here after I am all done with that. Basically having Vocal be my first draft and Medium be my final draft.

I feel really odd or tired, and it is so odd that I am doing some of the same things as a few years ago. I am pretty sure I am going to be more encouraging this person to join a language school than talk to me any further but, I am just going to give them some resources and give them some boost of confidence to work on their English.

They are from Switzerland so I am thinking that their English is actually good most likely, but I will learn some more of what's going on tomorrow.

I also have an appointment an hour before that one so it feels a little hectic but not really, as long as I work on the pamphlet for the majority of the time today, I'll be ok. As long as I don't slack today, I'll be fine tomorrow. It is just a steady stream of busy-ness.

I will miss writing here, or maybe I will continue writing my thoughts here and just have Medium be my more educational or interesting posts.

Who knows, we just got to roll with the punches for now.