When Dreams Come With Doubts...

Ever since I was a younger kid (I'm technically still a teenager), I’ve been told I’d make a great doctor. Not because I was diagnosing teddy bears or carrying a mini stethoscope around — but because my mom and grandma who are really loving and inspirational wanted to be doctors but life (finances) had other plans.

So naturally, the dream was passed on like a cherished family heirloom.

When you're younger, everything seems so certain. People ask, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” and you’re expected to have a cute, confident answer. Except mine which comes with 10+ years of education, exams that steal your soul, and a tendency to cry over anatomy textbooks at 2 a.m. And for the longest time, I was on board. Helping people? Yes. Science? mind-blowing. Wearing a white coat and looking important? Absolutely.

I still find all of this fascinating. The brain is wild because it stores memories, emotions, entire social media passwords, and still somehow accepts seeing a picture of itself without short-circuiting and I absolutely adore the thought of inventing treatments to Alzheimer's or Dementia. Therefore, It's not the subject that makes me hesitate; it's the never ending journey, the years of study, the burnout and the sacrifices.

I didn’t expect to be this confused at this age- university choices, career doubts, pile of academic work, pressure.

People say, "Follow your passion!" "Do what you love"

But what if your passion is hiding in a cave somewhere, dodging career counselors and motivational quotes? What if the dream that you signed up for is etched in your brain to the point where you don't even know what interests you have.

As much as I want to make my family proud, talking deeply about this is just not compatible by the Wi-Fi connection between generations!

So here I am. Still studying. Still dreaming. Still unsure. But also—still thriving.

Still hoping that one day, I’ll figure it out by believing in my potential and letting the universe do it's magic.

That one day, I’ll learn to accept whatever path I take or maybe develop the interest overtime

The weirdest part? Some days I wake up absolutely sure I want to be a doctor. Other days I spiral into a Google search that starts with “careers that are fast, respected, and well-paid” and ends with me reading blog posts from ex-med students who became tutors/lecturers and sometimes graphic designers.

It’s not even that I don’t like hard work; I just want to know that all the effort is going somewhere. Somewhere real. Somewhere mine because I give up very easily when I find it hard to tell if I'm on the right path

Because being a teenager with a big dream is not always comfortable as everyone’s passing it to you with good intentions, but at some point, you have to decide whether to hold on, toss it, or turn it into something entirely new.

If you’ve ever been in this weird space between pressure and passion — hey, same. You’re not alone. We’re all out here trying to figure things out in our own awkward, confused, slightly caffeinated way.

And if you want to support a thriving student figuring life out one neuron at a time, you can find me through the link below.

No pressure — unless you’re a blood vessel. Then yeah, pressure matters.

☕ Support My Journey - https://buymeacoffee.com/studylogue