The Broken Tornado

Another day, another dollar. I send a text to my love and she responds with “k”.

I roll my eyes and recap the argument from last night in my brain. She yelled, I yelled. What the fight was about has very little importance to me. The fact that she can be still upset at me hours later sending slandering text is incredible. I respond calmly,as it’s easy to tell by her last message she’s completely unhinged.

“I’ll be at the pick up spot, same as always by 5:05 pm today. Try not to be late this time, “seems like your thing these days”…

I reread it out loud, it’s calm, kind and straight to the point. I click send and instantly get a response.

“Okay” I shake my head laughing. Still with the same childish narrative. Ridiculous, I pick up the phone to call a friend because someone has to about how horribly I’m being treated after working all day. What a life she has. I think to myself. She has a partner who work long hours, I come home late but I always come home and all she has to do is pick me up from a bus stop. It’s amazing how little effort she puts into this relationship.

Hey friend, how you doing a happy female voice picks up on the other end of my phone. Relief washes over me. How refreshing it is to hear from someone who has such a beautiful outlook on life. I quickly go through the basic pleasantries so I can dive into my story.

Back at home, Shelby’s phone buzzes on the counter as she’s stirring a pot, trying to make dinner with a crying toddler on hip. She’s tries to put her toddler down to reach for it and is met with screaming.

“No mommy,no down, nooo down, no down”!

As his pacifier hangs out his mouth through his words. He has a death grip on her hair. She turns away from the stove and tries to pull him off. He rips out one of her earrings in the process. Eyes filled with tears, she unlocks her phone. And replies K. It’s all she can muster up right now and her son has latched onto her leg yet again.

She’s shakes her head, thinking just 30 mins before she’s was at work at her daycare doing the same thing. Except not with toddlers with babies. She was calmly rocking them, reading to them and teaching them the basics to help them grow. She loved being an Early Childhood Educator and a mom. She just wishes she had help, or that her partner thought of her job as actual work. But he doesn’t. Her phone buzzes again and it’s a message from her part time job asking if she can come to work next Sunday. Her one day off. She looks at the stacks of bills on the counter and reluctantly agrees.

She’s feels defeated, tired and overwhelmed. Her phone buzzes yet again. The rice has burnt on the stove in the process. She looks at the time at it’s 4:50 pm. She looks down at her screaming son who has managed to spill his bottle all over himself and the floor. She’s drops to her knees and starts crying while holding her son and rocking him back and forth. He looks like he’s falling asleep. Her phone buzzes again in her hands and she quickly reads the message in hopes it doesn’t buzz again and wake her son up. It reads,

“I’ll be at the pick up spot, same as always by 5:05 pm today. Try not to be late this time, “seems like your thing these days”…

What? Shelby thinks to herself, why would he send this so late! She responds with “okay” then looks over at the clock again and it’s now 5:03 pm. There’s no way she’s going to make a 15 min drive in 2 mins. She’s late, and she has to change their son, so now she’s really late. His bus times change daily she’s whispered to herself while carrying her son up the stairs, how am I ever supposed to keep up with this. It wouldn’t be this way if he didn’t lose his license to drunk driving and was given a $30,000 ticket that he has to work long days to pay off. Now I’m paying a mortgage and household bills all by myself. Tears started brimming in Shelby’s eyes again. She checked her watch and it was 5:25 now. She had no time for tears and quickly wiped them away, finished dressing their son and got into the car.

“Unreal” the female voice said to Luis over the phone.

“I know right” he responded taking a long draw of his cigarette. This is what I’m talking about, she has no sense of time. It’s 5:40 pm she’s beyond late at this point and I sent a text to her way in advance and she replied with attitude saying “K”.

“Wow” the female voice responded. Really? She’s didn’t even ask about your day?.

“Nope” not even for a second. She’s too consumed with her wants and needs. She has no clue how hard I work to pay our bills. I hate that I am being treated so unfairly. I feel alone.

That’s rough, the female voice replies. Sounds like she’s being pretty disrespectful.

I don’t know how I put up with this Luis replied. I’ll call you later, she just pulled up.

Shelby! Where is Shelby? A male voice yelled.

Shelby paced back and forth in her work bathroom.

“Okay, she whispered to herself, you can do this, it’s just a dance, you got this”

Shelby! She herd a male voice yell again, if your not out here in 2 mins I’m pulling your set.

Shit! Shelby groaned, out of time. She put on her best fake smile and hurried out of the bathroom.

“Chill out Frank!” She yellled, I’m here, I’m here.

Yeah I see that! Frank replied waving his finger in Shelby’s face, that’s my point. Get your tail out there! He yelled pointing to a stage. You standing here ain’t making me no money.

Reluctantly Shelby headed for the stage, she pulled her hair out of her ponytail, gave it a shake, then squared her shoulders. She exhaled, and whispered to herself “ remember the bills” and then stepped out into the bright lights at the centre of the stage. Please welcome Lucky Charm! She herd Frank say, she’s magical delicious!

Thankful for the loud music that was playing, Shelby drowned out the screams from the row of men and danced the night away. She finished her set by hanging upside down on the pole as the audience cheered and screamed “encore”. She exhaled the breath she didn’t even realize she was holding and walked off stage into a robe that was being held open for her. Well done Shelby! said the club security guard. Your a natural. Shelby forced a smile and then got dressed in her security guard uniform that she brought with her from her old job. She still hasn’t told Luis she was fired for leaving in the middle of work to pick her son up and she had no plans too. As long as she worked 2 jobs that’s all he cared about was money. She looked at herself in the mirror and didn’t even recognize the person staring back at her. But just like everything else she couldn’t deal with right now, she just walked away.