Renter's Remorse

Renters make up about 36% of American households. With the rising cost of real estate combined with crushing debt and stagnant wages, that number is only growing.

The average rent is close to $2000 per month. Rents keep going up at rates that our wages do not. It seems that the disproportionately high monthly payments should afford renters some basic comfort and dignity.

My family has occupied the same two bedroom apartment (which is technically just a one bedroom apartment with a den) for the last six years. Here are a few stories from my personal experience as a renter.

* I recognize that there are renters out there with circumstances worse than mine and people with nowhere to call home. In a country with a $6.82 trillion dollar federal budget, I don’t think anyone should be denied a place to live. I wish Americans could agree to have each others backs, because the truth is that most of us are one layoff or unexpected medical bill away from financial ruin.

When a door becomes a wall

Our apartment has drafty doors and windows. It is especially bad in my daughter’s room. She has sliding glass doors that make you feel just about everything mother nature has to offer. We compensate by blasting the heat or air conditioning. When we first moved in I tried calling the rental office to see if they could add some weather stripping or something else that could close the gap.

The maintenance guy arrived with a caulk gun, the kind you’d use on bathroom tiles. I thought that was an odd choice, but I figured he knew what he was doing. He proceeded to apply the caulk to the gap in the door. He told me to wait a few hours. I asked him what would happen when I opened the door. He seemed confused. “Just open the door,” He said. I stood there questioning my own sanity until three hours later when I tired the door and sure enough, he had sealed me in!

Dude, you forgot your…

We had a leak in our sink and a very nice maintenance guy came to fix it. I remember he had the Super Mario Bros theme song as his ringtone. Plumber humor. I was happy that they had sent someone who specialized in something instead of just another handy man.

Hours after he left, my seven year old found a strange object on the kitchen counter that we couldn’t identify. It turned out to be a vaping device which he came back for, but to the uninitiated this thing looked very suspicious. I’m not here to judge anybody’s habits, but maybe just leave that in your pocket next time, huh, pal?

Death Proof

My dog died last year. He was a very good boy and we miss him terribly. When I called to notify the rental office to discontinue our pet rent, it was annoying, but not surprising that they would ask for proof. I dutifully called the Vet’s office and they sent my landlords an email. Well, apparently that was insufficient, because we continued to have $45 pet rent added to our monthly total. We had to go down there and beg them to stop charging us for our dead dog.

Fridge Fiasco

Our refrigerator broke one summer at the worst possible time because we had just stocked up at the grocery store. I called the rental office as soon as I noticed it. They said they’d have someone come and replace it ASAP. We waited and waited and waited. Nobody came. It wasn’t until the next day that they came with a new fridge. There was a brown substance smeared inside and a few strands of what I assumed to be human hair.

I called the rental office back. First, they refused to pay for the spoiled food. Then, they insisted that there was nothing wrong with the new fridge. It was in storage, so it might have been dusty. I sent them a picture and they apologized, but still refused any compensation for the spoiled food.

Dryer Disaster

Our dryer takes several cycles to dry a load of laundry. That is just a fact of life that we have accepted. But one day it stopped working entirely. I called the rental office and they sent over a guy who cautioned us that the issue that was causing the dryer to stop working was also a fire hazard. The machine was missing a part and it would be a few days before he could replace it. I remember thinking, Cool, guess we'll just sit tight and wait to die.

In the meantime I needed to do laundry. I asked the rental office to help us out with money for the laundromat. They had a better idea. They told me I could do my laundry in one of the vacant apartments. The first apartment they sent me to did not have a working dryer either, a fact I didn’t notice until I’d lugged all of my wet clothes up the stairs. I called them again. They sent me to a second vacant apartment…

Of course, misery loves company. If you’ve got a funny, amazing, or infuriating renter’s tale, put it in the comments!

Sources:

https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2021/08/02/as-national-eviction-ban-expires-a-look-at-who-rents-and-who-owns-in-the-u-s/

https://www.businessinsider.com/millennials-own-less-real-estate-than-boomers-statistic-2020-1

https://datalab.usaspending.gov/americas-finance-guide/spending/