Raising my standards

I am raising my standards. Now, I just don't want a boy whose isn't clear about his feelings for me and says that I am just like his sister or someone who often shows up like a "Surprise, I exist" and act like they care about me, love me but doesn't give a damn about me and ignore me for weeks.

Why should I affect my mental peace for those who doesn't even think I am their priority, who doesn't see me the way a man in love would see their girl, support their dreams and help them grow.

And, I don't understand Why is it necessary for me to have man in my life? Are they going to make things easier? No, They will probably make things harder for me.

But, still I just can't control my emotions seeing the man I like. Why do I need to have feelings for him when they act that way? Why can't I move on from them?

Since, I am raising my standards, I am now going to focus on myself. My growth, my ambition, my personality, my interest. I am willing to be so focused at being better that I don't think of anybody else expect me. I want to bring all the energy that I invested in them, back to me and using it in creating better version of me.

The comeback is personal. No matter what, I am not going to fall for this trap again. I will work for myself, earn money and become independent. Now, I want to do everything by myself and enjoy every experience. It doesn't mean that I don't need anybody. It just means that I can handle everything by myself but I will take help if people offer in a way that doesn't make me feel insecure, unworthy and uncomfortable.

I won't be chasing love and become obsessed with one guy. I think there are better things to do than to chase other man for fake attention and validation. I own my space and I know I am good. I don't need anybody to tell me that.

Now, I attract opportunities and people. I am glad for everything that has ever happened to me. I am looking forward for my new self, explore inner self and cherish the child inside of me. The only think I need is peace, calmness and patience to tackle every stage of life.

I don't want to make myself a copy of someone or somebody. I just want to be real, learn new things and avoid the drama. This year, I am going to unlock my highest potential become someone unbeatable by never quitting my dreams for others.

This time I am going to be selfish. I will consider myself first rather than everyone else who doesn't put any value in my life. I am looking for change and the change that makes me unrecognizable, that brings the best out of me.

I no longer want to fear the judgments of society. I might be dumb, introvert, silly, crazy in their eyes but In my eyes I am pure, I am genuine and kind. By the way, who cares what others think? They are here to live their life so am I? So, How come I stop living my own life when they are enjoying their life?

I got this one life and I am going to make the most out of it. The only life, that I have is this. I just don't know what might happen tomorrow, therefore I am gonna live every moment I can.

MY STANDARDS ARE REALLY HIGH NOW. NOT EVERYONE CAN MATCH THAT.