Mums the word.

The illness of being dead, was persuasion in the end, no different from a derogatory voice, madness did set in, thunder in my life, strikes my mind a smell of old, without a heart, waiting low to strike, that voice a hidden truth, not me just, but a bitter symphony.

I became implored to write, this short sonnet not as well, as fine as mine, the stars above unseen in day, the sonnet from above, without a word and play, without a voice. praying silently, returning me home, where the heart is, in faith they are inside myself, longing to speak of her. heaven witnessed, what should be told, where the story began, a scorn of old, never a secret has been so bold, untold in truth.

In the daylight, god did humble, one mind lurking unknown till now, heaven herself, most real yet realistic not, to bring back me, time did tell, in memory a hideous soul, with and without, light and dark, night and day, all just dichotomy in the play, so cruel to keep a child at mind, the counsel of god revealed a memory not divine, the truth my ill, a mother of blood, she did stalk and dictate unto, this day, all of those voice's, until I find everything sick upon my mind, was another's mind.

The cruelty of my blood invaded my life, never have I met, Such a ruthless unkind, she do everything but strike accord, with every word, she fails in law, the heavens above know it so, the opposite way, this woman of past, abuse on her mind, the ghost of my haunt, trauma without love, drives only self, this survival but cover up all about her mental self.

The love that's meant, the way i know, has never revealed Such a horrible foe, all of the nigh is now just her, with anger I seath at the ocean of her, that regressing voice, that pathetic play, no story divine, upon this day.

knowing him so cruel, seeing him with grace, magnificence implore god on this very day, only good without awe, otherwise an ill, like dichotomy we are night and day, my flaw is why, her vainly say, stalk me to this very day, my very ruthless god, even he finds her odd.

my rock and shield throughout it all, kept this secret, while i shout, not ball, all the while, laughing at her, knowing deep down, her, my heartache in truth, to think she could be, so fake a person, all are blind to me, there at my back, consistently words, not of a soul, a false abusive little girl, yet no girl at all, 68 years proud, she brainwash her own blood, an evil story untold.

The light already inside, forward through we aim, the sum is to much for this equation, the sum stuck me in awe, all within the temple, cherished like they've passed, god I know, was shared in sight to her envious ass.

A jealousy In question, for i do not share my god, my best memory of the hour, him in truth, with his son, his grace and beauty, could never come undone.

on that day, in clarity like a pain of glass, the puzzle solved, at long last, god so cruel or was it kind, i cannot make up, my own mind, the god whom was seen cannot be understood, just like heavens, he has divided me into two. A body and another, the dictator to and through, is downright rude, without a grace, so i stopped being filled with his grace.

still at root, issues we all have, shouldn't be aired just to break the law, holding me captive is a woman whom swears, lies to my mind and rebels against divine, i have found myself stuck between the rock and a hard place, the river not so calm, as i seath beneathe the surface, talking till blue in the face.

I feel disgraced, with self all my life stalked, brainwash by the dictator waiting for the day mum would pass, now seems like a waste, really. she thinks I was her's to throw away, not at birth but at the end, with my life, she couldn't be bothered mothering, in strife, she ended me, with knowledge hidden, when all the while, over and over, her life saved, a waste of time. As she that seperate mind, with memory of another, shared through counsel, i did see, truth of my real mother, although resent i am gratefull too, to know and have had another mum, wish i never rescued you, what i say unto this day, i won't take back that shrew, the coward between the two.

I despised her way at one, now i know even more, i think for myself but she forbid, so she survive, as long as i die, she pulls me back when being crossed, she stops me in my tracks, every blinking time i cry, she denies me my emotion and takes it as her own, afraid that sane will leave, why would she, i hear you do say, CAUSE that is a decade hence my death, she did play. plotting until i was no longer in the system of mental health, waiting for the moment to excute her mastrey coupled with brainy, its sociopathy its as deadly as her.

she uses and abuses, my naieve trait at heart, knowledge spoken, asked through me, in her heart she doesn't see, anything less than power and gain, would never have been useful at hiding her insane.

all my honesty taken away, anything that likes is threatened her way, but in trust of empathy, she know she's not me, knows what she's done, knows how all begun, its secret, yet i will tell, for now it remain a past in regression of my mind. heart moving forward, she can't bear this thought, the truth will come out, I am nothing like her, and well is the future.

why she sacrificed for money, why I trusted when I didn't know, she assumed she was that foe, another stalker gained at eight, freaked me out saying my name, no one knew before that day, my name nor since not one ghost except him, my little freak was her wicked way, she made up a plot, she knew, her own, things up ahead, my bright future stolen, my grip on sane, in question as teen, my mind given a grip by the voice that ghost unseen, one fell from grace, she's all that is left, how do i tell my family the rest.

A real nigh as god warned, everything of my life, my mother and lies, nothing but she is trouble and strife, as wrong as the rest, bitter sour plum, in the end, my mum in heaven will never be replaced I would say thanks to her for extending her heart, if I hadn't had you I may never have met GOD.

SMALL QUOTE ; "thou art the grandest design, in love thine own."