I wish I had cut my friends earlier

I owe my success to the people around me, but when it comes to giving credit to my friends, that’s a little more complicated. The way they sabotaged my growth didn’t hit me until I took a step back and noticed the pattern. At first, it led me to loneliness — but it also gave me the space to reconnect with the people who truly mattered and helped me reach milestones I once thought were out of my reach.

Before starting, I want to introduce myself in a few words to give you a picture of who I am. I ’m in my early 20s, and my life has always been a rollercoaster. I’ve always dreamt big — even while coming from a place where logistics and mobility often held back many growth stories. I haven’t made any flashy titles yet, like the first million dollars, but I feel when the time is right, it will come too. I am satisfied with what I am and what I am doing now, with a positive outlook for the next 5 years. This is where I owe it to my father.

My father has always been my inspiration. Coming from a humble background, he made a life where things were just a little more accessible to us. How he defined life shaped the way I grew up. He never said “No” to anything. If I asked him, "Can I be President tomorrow?" he wouldn’t laugh it off but would genuinely believe that if I wanted it, I could go get it.

This was something no amount of wealth could compensate for. “Believe in yourself” is what he taught us. Your ambitions might sound absurd to others at times, but life rewards those who dream big — that’s what he believed in. Now, let’s get back to the story.

Growing up in such a positive environment made me dream sky-high (and I ’ve made many of those dreams a reality), but for a brief period, I was failing — even though everything seemed to be in my hands.

It turned out to be my friends. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate them, but they were the reason I was holding myself back from the ambitious life I wanted. They were fun to hang out with, spend time with, and party with — but subconsciously, their perceptions sabotaged my growth.

This is where the difference between how your environment as a kid comes to highlight. While I didn’t have much as a kid and that hunger was always there to make it — make it big where life feels more than just survival — many of my friends came from places of abundance.

Being well off isn’t a curse, but in my personal feeling, it makes your belly full. What I mean is it kills your appetite to go further, because honestly, you don’t have any reason for that. Why would you risk stability when you already have everything life is all about?

So how it sabotaged my growth was how they “assisted” me. As we didn’t share the same wavelength, it wasn’t like they literally hit the Delete button on my work, but how they portrayed me — or say, advertised me — as overambitious, which sabotaged my image in the public sphere.

To top it off, how subconsciously they reacted to my work also made me question my abilities and undersell myself, causing me a great hit.

I am not implying they owe me anything, but the fact that they unintentionally did that to me hit me hard — when I took a step back after that incident that changed my public sphere. And after that change, I never looked back and instantly saw results.

So now let’s get back to the incident that made me realise I couldn’t take it anymore. That moment pushed me to cut myself off from the noise and start finding people who actually respected my work and dedication — and turned that into something meaningful and lovely.

Between friends, there are always moments of joy and sorrow, so pointing out just one thing as the only reason for the fallout is difficult. But the tension had been building for a long time, and distrust was growing because of it. One day, it exploded — not from me, but from my friends — during a gathering to celebrate another friend's birthday.

What started as a heated rant by one of my friends suddenly got redirected toward me, and it hit hard — harder than a rock to the head. I never realized they had so much resentment piled up inside, while I honestly hadn’t done anything to affect their lives negatively. I had always been there for them — day or night, rain or shine, I was that person.

What crushed me even more was that the others didn’t stop him. No one tried to calm the situation or speak up for me. That silence spoke volumes — maybe this is how they really felt all along. And if you're thinking, maybe I did something to deserve it, then no. All I ever did was talk about my aspirations.

I still remember those words — questioning my worth, bashing me for dreaming beyond the roof. I felt humiliated and walked out in tears. I was shattered. Friends meant the world to me, and I had very few of them. Humans are social animals — we crave that bond.

So, what did I do after that? I tried to fix it. I thought maybe an apology could help patch the wound. But nothing happened. And now, I’m thankful it didn’t. If things had been smoothed over back then, I’d still be stuck — trapped under that ceiling, never realising the sky was always an option.

Post that incident followed a deep trauma for a few months and a sense of loneliness. I was feeling alone, with no one to share how I felt. But my parents noticed it and asked me why I wasn't hanging out anymore and seemed lost in myself. I wasn’t in any position to share, but they understood me anyway. They made me realize that even if they couldn’t fully grasp what I was going through — because of the generation gap — they were still there for me.

That day, I realised I wasn't lonely — I was just surrounded by the wrong people and had my guard down.

What followed after that realisation was a surge of confidence, and from that day forward, I never looked back. Today, it's been four years since that incident, and just yesterday, I found myself recalling it — how that moment changed my life completely. I feel fulfilled now. I'm living a version of the life I always aspired to.

So, do you have someone holding you back, like mine did?

If yes, maybe taking a step back — just for a while — can help you see things clearly.

And believe me, it’s not easy. But it’s worth it.

Because sometimes, your breakthrough isn’t waiting on the outside — it’s waiting on the other side of who you walk away from.