I Regret Going to College

I work full-time and still don’t make enough money to cover my bills. I make more than minimum wage and normally avoid buying things for myself. I haven’t bought new clothes for myself in over two years, and I don’t buy name brands. If I had a medical or other emergency I wouldn’t be able to afford it, and it would cost my job if I missed work. I don’t even own a car, so I wouldn’t be able to use DoorDash to earn extra income. 

I also made the decision to attend college when I was younger, which means I owe more than my annual income. While I’m not alone in my struggle, it feels like my world is crashing down. I didn’t go into a field that would repay my debt, nor did I finish school. 

When I went to high school, I was supposed to be discovering what I wanted to do as a career. Instead, I learned about college. I knew the difference between community colleges and universities. I knew about T.O.P.S., which was a scholarship program that I couldn’t qualify for, or at least I didn’t apply for. I’d even been taken on a field trip to a local university, the only field trip I’d been on since elementary school. 

The one thing I didn’t learn was about the financial aid process. Some of the college pamphlets mentioned aid for needy students. I was still clueless when it came to loans. I didn’t know that it would be nearly impossible for me to repay them with the amount of interest being piled on, or that taking the loans would prevent me from acquiring a home in the future. 

I didn’t go to college directly after high school. I entered the workforce first. I started working in fast food and quickly decided that job wasn’t for me. I moved on, taking multiple jobs in the retail field, but I struggled to pay the bills. I wanted something better for myself, so I attended community college. 

When I signed up, I wasn’t sure what career I wanted to enter. No one was there to take me through my options, they quickly told me to pick a major because of financial aid. The financial aid would only cover my classes, and not my books, but that was presented as fine because there were loans available to help me cover the costs. 

I knew nothing about loans or credit at the time. I didn’t even have a credit card, so I wasn’t fully aware of what I’d signed up for. I was told that I wouldn’t have to worry about the loans unless I was no longer in college. I wrongly believed that I would be able to pay off the loans with a job I gained using my education. 

At the time, I believed I was bettering my life, but I soon determined that wasn’t the case. While I was still in school, I decided that I wanted to buy an apartment complex. I planned to live in one of the units and use the rest as income towards the mortgage. I went through the documents and would have been approved, if not for my student loans. I was denied a future because of a decision I made under the impression that I was improving my future. 

I was overwhelmed by the amount of money offered to me. I’d never had that much money before. Despite being given large loans, there was no one to educate us on how to spend the money. Some of my classmates used their money to go on shopping sprees or make large purchases that they normally wouldn’t be able to. I mostly used mine to pay my rent, buy groceries, and even buy a budget laptop for my schoolwork. 

I didn’t borrow the money because I wanted to. I took out loans because I needed them to survive while attending college.

The loans that I used for survival caught up to me. I’m at the point in my life where I regret going to college. I’m unsure how I’ll repay the loans, and I feel hopeless.