Can You Be in Love With Someone Who Never Loved You Back?

The First Time I Saw Him

I still remember the first time I noticed Ayan. He wasn’t loud or trying to be the center of attention — he just had this quiet, calm energy that made you feel safe. We were in the same literature class. He raised his hand to talk about a poem one day, and the way he spoke, like he really felt the words… it stayed with me. He didn’t just understand things — he saw them, in the kind of way most people miss.

From Classmates to Friends That Felt Like More

We gradually started talking after class — nothing dramatic, just easy conversations about books, music, and random things like whether tea is better than coffee. It turned into study sessions, long walks around campus, sending each other memes at midnight, and sharing playlists.

He made me feel seen, in a way no one else really did. With him, I didn’t have to try too hard — I could just be. And honestly, I started to fall for him long before I realized it. It wasn’t the butterflies kind of love. It was much more — the kind that settles in slowly, quietly, and then refuses to leave.

Everyone used to ask if we were dating, and I’d laugh it off. But deep down, I wanted it to be true. He never said anything that crossed a line, but the way he cared, the way he showed up… it felt like more.

The Night I Told Him

One evening, we were sitting by the river near campus, watching the lights flicker on the water. I did not know why, but something in me said, just tell him. So I did.

I looked at him and said, “I think I’m in love with you.”

He didn’t say anything suddenly. Just stared out at the water, then turned to me with the softest expression and said, “You’re one of the most important people in my life. But I don’t feel the same way.”

I nodded like I understood. I even smiled. But my heart sank. I’d hoped for so long that maybe, just maybe, he felt it too.

Loving Someone Who Couldn’t Love Me Back

Here’s the hardest part: I still loved him after that. I didn’t walk away. I stayed. We kept talking, still hung out sometimes, and I acted like I was okay. But I wasn’t. It hurt, every time he called me “buddy” or told me about a girl he liked. I felt like I was slowly disappearing inside myself.

But I also couldn’t just stop loving him. Love doesn’t come with an off switch. It lingers — even when it’s not returned.

And I started asking myself all those quiet questions… Was I not enough? Did I imagine the connection? Was it one-sided all along?

Letting Go Wasn’t a Moment — It Was a Process

Eventually, we drifted. Not because we fought — we didn’t. Just… life moved on, and we weren’t part of each other’s everyday anymore.

Letting go wasn’t one big dramatic goodbye. It was small things. Not checking his profile. Skipping our favorite song when it came on. Not texting him when something reminded me of him. Slowly, I learned how to live without expecting him to come back.

So… Can You Be in Love With Someone Who Never Loved You Back?

Yes. I was. And honestly? It was real. Just because it wasn’t mutual doesn’t make it less valid.

Loving Ayan taught me things I never knew about myself — that I’m capable of deep love, even when it hurts. That I can hold space for someone and still walk away when I need to heal. That my heart is soft, but strong.

And maybe one day, someone will love me the way I loved him — fully, and without hesitation.

Until then, I’ll keep choosing to love, even if it’s messy. Even if it breaks a little first.