Beautiful yet Broken

I say you broke me but really if I’m being honest you taught me a lot of things:

What it’s like to be with a narcissist

How far I can go if I love someone

How genuine I can be if someone is just a little nice

How much I can cry in one night or in one day yet hold my head up and tight

How much id be hurting but I’d still choose to be nice

How much I can hurt

How much I can feel

What it’s like when you’re being protective or jealous

To what extent I can go being a nice person and to what extent I’d become a bad b

How confident I am in myself

How brave I am

How much I believe in myself as well as the person

How I can spark the good in someone

How I can spark the bad in someone

How to observe more accurate

I’m not supposed to not trust my intuition

I must listen to my gut feeling

I must focus on my goals despite how breaking the process can be

How to be better

How to read between the lines

How to be there for someone

How to be more forgiving

But really most of all- I’d say I had it all in me but meeting you made me meet my true self and I love that.

They ask me to leave you and you must think wow she is just the same as others- so, i tell you this- you see, when you compared me to all your other experiences and say that I am same: you should also know that, maybe you could be the problem and you need fixing? It’s about time, You pay attention more to yourself, your actions and your doing rather second person’s. I always tell you this because if you must know me then I’m sure you’d be aware that- as sweet and Leo I am if I’m being rude to someone then they earned that themselves because I find no joy in being that person. If you are going to make me push my limits and still choose to cross it then be ready when I am not gentle anymore. Sincerely, don’t expect the same sweet treatment.

You must understand that I may feel happy and good when someone says I’m a nice person but I really do not feel any bit when someone calls me a bad person, merely because, nobody defines my worth but me. Only, I can give off the energy I want out there. Only I can make myself happy and feel worthy of happiness.

You wanted me to feel myself or May I say you simply want to put good out there giving a piece of yourself- if it costs. But, you see, I was always whole in my own. I always live my life like I own this world because I really do own my own world.

I told you I love you and shamelessly expressed all my feeling as well as emotions- but it all seemed too much for you to even comprehend. You felt suffocated and felt like you have to carry my love- whereas, my love has always meant to support you make you see from the heights of this beautiful world, to put you up so high you can reach the sky because sky is the limit. Maybe you pursued it the wrong way.

Last night, I was told that it’s done you don’t want me in your life and I took it as lightly as I could but I’m still a human being who has desires as well- little did you know the few nights before I’d just prayed that if I’m not good for you may that I’m removed from your life.

I love you really, a lot. I’ll always love you but this time, differently, from a distance, from a different perspective, from as much close as I’ve always been to you, and from as far as you can’t reach me or see me or even feel me.