Addictions

Marie and Becky walked into the crowded meeting while chatting and sat down at their usual place. It was a very large meeting and often had a hundred people attend. After sitting Marie looked at the table at the end of the hall and saw cake. They only had cake at meetings when someone was celebrating their anniversary. And this meeting had the best cake. After she sat her pocketbook and water bottle down, she went over to the table and got a piece and then sat back down. She ate it in less than two minutes.

A woman who had only four months sober was talking to her and Becky. Marie just smiled and nodded while Becky gave the woman some advice. Marie was busy looking over at the cake table and counting how many pieces were left. She wanted another piece and she wanted it now, but she didn’t want to seem like a pig. She told herself that if there was any left halfway through the meeting she would get another piece.

Just then a new person walked in and sat down at the table across the hall from Marie. He was probably in his late twenties, so about ten years younger than her. She couldn’t help staring at him as he was very attractive in an unshaven kind of way. He was thin and tall with shaggy dark brown hair.

The meeting started the way it always does; first with announcements and then with the reading of the twelve steps and traditions. Then Stephen started to tell his story. He was celebrating two years sober. When he was finished, he called on other people to share. Between the cake and the guy, Marie was so distracted she barely heard a word anyone said.

She looked over and saw that there was one piece of cake left. Just as she was about to get up to go get it, somebody else took it. She cursed herself for waiting so long, and then reluctantly accepted the fact that it would be stale convenient store doughnuts again that night.

Stephen called on the new guy to share. He said that his fiancé had just ended their eight-year relationship and then pointed to the tattoo on his arm of her name He continued to say that the week before she had the cops throw him out before he could get any of his stuff, so he was pretty sure she had destroyed it all. He talked for a while, longer than people were supposed to, but nobody stopped him. Probably because it was obvious to everyone that he needed help. His story was so depressing it made Marie want to cry, but also hold him.

A few more people shared before the meeting ended. At the end they gave out sobriety chips like always. The new guy got one for twenty-four hours sober. Once the meeting was finished everybody stood around talking like always.

Marie watched as several people talked with the new guy. She really wanted to talk to him and give him her number and invite him back to her place.

She stood there thinking about her disease of addiction. Most people in AA only have a problem with drinking, but Marie had several addictions. She thought about how much fun it would be to invite him back to her place, but then reminded herself that there’s a reason why women work with women and men work with men in the program. At just twenty-four hours sober, he was way too vulnerable.

People who have been sober for a while are supposed to talk with and help the newcomers. Marie decided that the best way she could help this guy was to not even introduce herself and to stay far, far away from him. She would find some other way to feed her addiction that night.