10 Blatantly Sexist Remarks About Women Made by a Man

Anyone can be sexist — men, women, and people of other genders. Discrimination isn’t limited to one group. It’s horrible, disgusting, annoying, and very unfair. Unfortunately, this is something we have to encounter once in a while, because people suck. There it is, one of the most straightforward pieces of wisdom I can share with others: humans suck. Pardon my lack of scientific terminology.

I’m a woman, and while I am very vocal about sexism against other genders, I am well-versed in sexist remarks and actions toward my own. I recently encountered someone who was a walking definition of sexism, which inspired this article. The man was an absolute menace and had zero clue that he was being sexist; in his mind, everything he was saying was fine. What he didn’t expect was to encounter me. While I rarely call people out on their behaviour, I certainly shock them with my reaction and replies. The poor guy was quite uncomfortable with some of my responses.

Here are 10 awful and very bright examples of sexist remarks made towards women by that not-so-gentleman, in real life, and my reactions to them.

#1: “You’re a Woman, So You Have No Logical Thinking. You’re All About Intuition.”

Peter — let’s call him that — uttered this phrase within the first ten minutes of meeting me. He’s a friend of a friend, and I had been tasked with driving him around and helping him settle into a new city over the next few months. I could have said no, but after he made several sexist remarks during our first visit, curiosity got the better of me. I decided to treat this as an experiment.

“But I have no intuition,” I replied. “I’m a business analyst, though. My entire life is built on using analytical thinking.”

Peter went quiet. I wasn’t sure if he was trying to come up with a comeback or if he genuinely believed that, as a woman, I must have consulted my intuition before responding — because clearly, in his mind, I had no logical thinking.

“That’s not possible,” Peter finally said. “Maybe you have some logic in you, but not a lot. Your intuition must be better than you think.”

The guy has probably never read a single scientific study in his life. If he did, perhaps he wouldn’t say such things.

I assured him that I would, in fact, consider following my intuition. My logic, however, told me it would be wise to minimise contact with someone so clearly sexist and toxic. But I decided to proceed with the experiment, for the plot. I was curious just how deeply sexist one man could be. Spoiler alert: very sexist.

#2: “Women are So Emotional, Followed by Him Being Emotional

I can’t say I was surprised when Peter proclaimed the phrase above. It’s every sexist person’s favourite statement. And yes, I said person’s, not man’s — because I’ve also encountered women who believe their gender is just “too emotional.” That, by the way, is a textbook case of internalised sexism.

“But Peter, you’re a very emotional man,” I once replied after hearing that comment for the umpteenth time. “Every time you talk about [a guy he hated], you get emotional. Just last week, you told me you nearly went into rage mode when he said something wrong to you. Meanwhile, you’ve already seen how calm I am. You’re clearly the emotional one here, while I, as a woman, have full control over my emotions. In fact, I rarely meet women who are as emotional as you.”

Silence. I think Peter forgot how to breathe for a moment. He stared at me in disbelief. His cheeks and forehead turned pale, then red, then pale again. He opened and closed his mouth repeatedly. Overall, he looked like he’d just been smacked in the face with a live fish.

Finally, he muttered:

“I… I think you’re a unique woman, Joanna. Women aren’t usually as calm as you are — ”

“Oh, they are!” I interrupted. “The majority of women I’ve met in my life are relaxed, calm, and emotionally mature. You’re definitely more emotional than most of them.”

I wasn’t mocking him, nor did I want to make him feel bad. I was just being honest and straightforward. My responses didn’t come from a place of resentment or irritation. I’m someone who stays extremely calm when dealing with people. It’s hard to upset me, or even get me to react emotionally. I was simply being genuine with Peter.

Poor Peter stayed quiet for the rest of the drive. He didn’t bring up “women being emotional” for a while.

#3: “Fathers Should Choose Husbands for Their Daughters”

This one caught me off guard. Both Peter and I come from a fairly closed-minded culture, but even I hadn’t heard a statement like that in ages. In fact, I don’t think I’ve heard it more than once or twice in my life — if ever.

“I met my wife through her father,” Peter said. “He liked me and introduced us. We got married and had two kids. Women should let their fathers find them husbands.”

As I mentioned, we come from a culture that can be quite traditional — maybe even sexist at times. But even in our Eastern European circles, this kind of thinking is rare. My East Asian friends, some of whom occasionally complain about their parents suggesting partners from “good families,” have never reported hearing anything so blatantly outdated or patriarchal. Peter was 15 years older than I, so not a huge gap. And yet, his level of sexism was completely bonkers.

Guess what happened six months later? Peter went back to his home country and to his wife, who told him she no longer loved him and had, in fact, been trying to get away from him for years.

Both Peter and his wife were refugees who had been forced to relocate to a more progressive country. Once there, his wife found a job and quickly thrived. She began earning her own money, and their two daughters fully supported her independence. It wasn’t that she’d been trapped and unable to leave — it seemed like she’d simply stayed for the sake of the kids. But the moment they grew up (and the move to a new country provided a fresh start), she decided to end things with Peter. I met her once, and I can confirm: his sexist remarks made her visibly uncomfortable.

So, should fathers choose husbands for their daughters? Maybe, but only if it’s a rare and respectful recommendation, and the daughter has full autonomy. But in many cases, it’s far more forceful than that. I don’t think that was true in Peter’s wife’s case, but around the world, countless women are pushed, guilt-tripped, or outright forced into marriages arranged by their parents. If you ask me, there’s a reason enough to deny this kind of thinking.

#4: “All Women Feel the Natural Call to Give Birth. You Will Feel It as a Woman When You’re Older”

I was in my late 20s when I met Peter. He was absolutely convinced that all women feel a natural, uncontrollable desire to have children. In his mind, it wasn’t a matter of if — it was just a question of when. Every woman, he insisted, would feel the inevitable pull to give birth by the time she turned 30 or 35.

It’s probably a good thing I didn’t ask him about people who feel urges to rape or molest children, and whether those were just part of “natural design” too — because who knows where that logic would have gone.

“I know women who don’t want kids,” I told him. “They’re over 30, and some are even over 40. They decided to be child-free, and they’ve never felt the need to give birth.”

Peter shook his head and looked at me as if I were a naive child, and he was some ancient sage bestowing wisdom.

“Those women are lying to themselves and everyone around them. It’s impossible for a woman not to want to be a mother. That’s just how nature made us. Once you’re older, you’ll understand.”

Well, I’m older now.

The thing is, I’m not child-free. I’ve always wanted at least one child. But I can also confidently say that some of my closest female friends have never wanted kids. Not at 20, not at 30, not now. In fact, many of them have been terrified of motherhood since they were teenagers. But hey! According to Peter, they’re all just lying to themselves.

#5: “Women Over 35 Are Desperate to Have Children, So They Get Pregnant and Marry the First Man They Meet”

I smiled and nodded when he said that. I couldn’t quite figure out why Peter was so obsessed with talking about women. He was a grown man — married, with a wife and daughters. Why did he spend so much time telling me this stuff? It didn’t bother me, really. I just felt really bad for his daughters.

“I know several women who never wanted kids,” I told him. “And none of them suddenly changed their minds in their late 30s or 40s. Also, you do realise that women can have children without men, right? All it takes is a trip to a sperm bank, and they can choose the best candidate. No need to have kids with men at all. No need for marriage either.”

Peter’s face went pale again, just like it had when I told him he was more emotional than most women. And again, I didn’t say it to upset him. I was just stating the obvious: people, regardless of gender, can easily have kids on their own. Science has made that possible for decades, and Peter knew that. Yet there he was, looking like he’d just been smacked across the cheeks with a trout.

I’m all for happy marriages — between men and women, women and women, men and men, or non-binary people and anyone else. Everyone should be free to form loving partnerships and families if they choose to. But it’s so naive to think that anyone, women or not, goes bananas after turning a certain age, goes into a hunting mode and obsesses about getting pregnant.

#6: “I Am a Man. A Woman Must Give Me Love and Intimacy”

Thankfully, I didn’t spend much time around Peter; he quickly packed his stuff and moved away. But I got the impression that his main goal was to use the people around him. Sure, the man had a few good traits. Unfortunately, he spent a lot of time figuring out how to profit from the situations and individuals around him.

Peter didn’t necessarily feel entitled to a woman, nor did he claim that men should be entitled to women — or at least, he wasn’t too vocal about it. But he most definitely exploited every connection he made, professional or personal, to benefit himself. While the guy wasn’t a total jerk, he certainly came off as a bottom-feeder who only cared about his own interests.

When his wife (or ex-wife at this point) announced she wanted to split, Peter blew up. He did not expect that a woman who had been so agreeable and convenient for almost two decades would try to break away from him. Guess what he cared about the most, though? His children? His two young daughters, both in their early teens, whose lives had already been turned upside down even before the separation? No. Peter didn’t care about that. All he cared about was losing access to the sex and emotional labour his wife had been providing for decades.

“What do you mean you aren’t worried about your girls?” I asked him, in shock. “They are so young and impressionable. A divorce is a huge tragedy in normal circumstances. Your daughters had to flee their home, and now their family is falling apart.”

“They’ll be fine,” Peter replied, seemingly uninterested. “They’re teenagers, not babies. Children are always fine. I’m worried about myself. I am a man — my woman must give me warmth, affection, and love. I require physical intimacy. This is why I got a wife in the first place and what I’m worried about.”

Charming, eh? The guy is facing a divorce, yet doesn’t care about his children’s broken hearts, pain, and suffering. All he’s thinking about is losing access to free emotional and sexual labour. I’ve got to be honest: meeting this not-so-much-of-a-man was excellent proof that my plan to potentially have children on my own is a solid, smart idea.

Peter isn’t even the worst example of male entitlement to women, especially to women’s bodies. The entire manosphere is perpetuating this mindset. Peter didn’t seem like a particularly educated or intelligent individual, so he wasn’t capable of in-depth analysis or using science or philosophy to support his warped beliefs. It’s especially dangerous when educated men — and women, too — use facts and data to justify their sexism, misogyny, and hate.

#7: “It’s Every Woman’s Job to Take Care of a Man and Family”

Just like many others, Peter’s mind was corrupted by the belief that it’s every woman’s job to drop her hopes and dreams and sacrifice herself for the good of her family. “The good” meaning cooking, cleaning, 24/7 childcare, bedroom services, and everything else.

However, like I mentioned before, Peter wasn’t the worst example of this mindset. He believed that his now ex-wife should have a hobby and a small job, if she wanted — so gracious of him. There are far worse examples of how people think.

What was interesting is that I saw a lot of internalised sexism in Peter. To his credit, he also discussed men’s roles as providers, earners, hunters, and so on. But the moment I asked him a few simple questions, it became clear he hadn’t done much critical thinking in his life.

“Wouldn’t you want your wife to be there for you if you got sick, turned very ill, or simply wanted to take time off work? Or even leave the toxic job you’ve been hating for a while?” I asked Peter. “I agree that partners have responsibilities. But don’t you think you deserve that kind of support, instead of worrying about not being able to take a few weeks off when you’re sick? Similarly, if your wife is exhausted from all the childcare, don’t you think you should take over for a bit?”

He got quiet and mumbled something about people having responsibilities and being family-oriented.

“Most of us are family-oriented,” I said, shrugging. “The real question is: have you ever considered living your life the way you wanted to — not the way society told you to? Even just for a short time, to go after the dreams you’ve been telling me about?”

Peter fell silent again and gave me a blank stare. I wasn’t trying to mess with him or instil doubt; I simply saw inconsistencies in what he was telling me. And there it was again — that face. The face of someone who’d just been smacked with a raw, smelly fish.

I felt bad for the guy, but not for long. Sorry, but I don’t usually feel long-term compassion for sexist misogynists who clearly suffer from the same rigid gender roles they promote — and instead of figuring out their lives, they double down on misogyny.

#8: “If a Woman Doesn’t Want Kids, Something Is Wrong with Her”

Peter’s small shreds of wisdom and positive character were usually short-lived. While he was surely capable of being a good person and saying smart things, he would inevitably revert to being sexist.

I don’t understand why some people — not just men, but women too — get so angry about women who don’t want children. It’s as if they’re insecure about their own choice to have kids and feel the need to justify it by criticising others who made different decisions.

I am not child-free. I’ve never been child-free. While I’m not obsessed with having children, I’ve known I wanted them since I was young. Most importantly, I believe my motivation to raise children comes from thoughtful reasoning, not selfishness or pressure “because society told me to.” But I would never criticise people who decide to be childless. I fully support child-free individuals, the right to make that choice, and access to abortion.

Sadly, Peter was subscribed to the misogynistic, control-infused school of thought when it came to the topic of childbearing.

“All women want to have kids. If a woman doesn’t want that, there’s something wrong with her.”

Believe it or not, the guy was supportive of LGBTQ+ rights. I suppose that was one of the reasons I didn’t immediately drop him despite all the sexist remarks; at the end of the day, the man had some good qualities. Somehow, he was fine with gay people and didn’t believe there was anything wrong with them. Childfree women, on the other hand, were a problem. Well, I guess that’s half a win?

“I know women who have been horrified by the thought of having kids since an early age,” I responded calmly. “They didn’t have any significant traumas. Upon meeting long-term boyfriends, they didn’t change their minds. Some people just don’t want to be parents.”

Peter shrugged me off. That was fine; again, I’m a very calm person. I rode this experiment to the very end and “collected” many sexist phrases from this man.

#9: “I Already Have Two Daughters, So I Still Need a Son”

Before learning that his wife wanted to leave him, Peter wouldn’t stop talking about having another kid. The guy was still relatively young, but considering the average life expectancy in his country of origin, having one more child would likely mean Peter wouldn’t be around for that kid’s high school graduation.

What made it worse was that he specifically wanted a son. As you may remember, Peter had two daughters. He kept telling me how he had always wanted a boy, but ended up with two girls.

“I’ve been asking my wife to have another kid for years now,” Peter would say every time the topic of kids came up. “I want a son. I already have daughters, so I need a son.”

I’m not entirely sure why that need was so strong for him. But based on all the other remarks and phrases I’d heard, it was clear he barely saw women as people. He didn’t necessarily hate women; he just seemed to see them as less human. Maybe not second-class citizens, but certainly not first-class ones.

I hope he never told his daughters how he always wanted a son instead of them.

#10: “It’s in a Woman’s Nature to Get Attached to Men After Sex”

I saved the most hilarious one for last.

Peter was convinced that women get attached to men the moment they have sex with them. All women. No exceptions.

“You don’t get it,” he exclaimed once, when I expressed my doubt. “Sex is such a high level of intimacy. Women get obsessed with men. There is no way around it.”

If you ask me, a high level of intimacy is a man admitting he’s been negatively affected by toxic masculinity and societal stereotypes, and asking his female partner to be patient while he works to overcome them, to improve his life and become a better person. Works the other way too.

A high level of intimacy also involves confessing your mistakes and seeing your partner stay with you as you work to fix them. It’s telling your loved one that you want to make a change in life, and watching them support you. It’s admitting to traumas and sharing your deepest secrets, while your spouse reassures you that none of it is your fault, and sticks with you as you get better. Now that might be the greatest intimacy humanly possible.

But for Peter, every time a woman went to the bedroom with a man, it meant she got “hooked” on the guy. I didn’t argue with him for too long, as he was getting emotional over this topic for some reason. So I decided to nod and agree. If Peter were to look up any actual studies, he would learned that his assumptions are uncorroborated. While women’s bodies release more oxytocin compared to men following sex, it doesn’t mean that men’s bodies don’t release any; they release less.

Conclusion

If you’ve read my work before, you may know that I call out sexism, misogyny, and misandry quite often. It’s not just men who make sexist remarks — women do too. But since I’m a woman myself, it makes sense that my life experiences revolve more around misogynistic men than misandrist women. Not to mention, in the era of Andrew Tate and the manosphere, I suspect there’s plenty of sexism circulating.

Meeting Peter wasn’t exactly pleasant, but it wasn’t entirely unpleasant either. I had a good laugh many times. Most importantly, everything he said and did reminded me that even in modern times, when we’re supposedly smarter and more educated than ever, not everyone is working on developing a fair, positive, and respectful view of life. Some are still stuck in a closed-minded, discriminatory space. A space that, ironically, hurts them too.

Just as I’m against women saying, “it’s a man’s job to take care of a woman, children, and everything else in their lives, while receiving little support,” I also reject the idea that women are obligated to have children and become servants to men. Sexism negatively affects all genders, and I’ve only addressed the two most prominent ones.

My main conclusion after encountering a blatantly sexist, misogynistic man like Peter is this: people like that don’t deserve our friendship, attention, or emotions. I would strongly recommend staying away from such individuals, especially as a woman. I’m still perplexed that Peter’s wife ever agreed to date him, let alone marry him and have children. But hey, at least she broke away, even if it took decades.

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