The Diary of This Over-Thinker.

Have you ever gone against your own feelings just to please others—just to feel relevant?

I’ve done it. I still do sometimes, though much less now.

2023 was a breaking point. I had one of my worst mental breakdowns that year, and somehow, 2025 feels like a repeat. Back then, I was faking smiles, hating myself quietly, and trying so hard to prove I was worthy to people who honestly didn’t matter. Even if it meant losing someone or something important to me.

I just wanted to be accepted.

People-pleasing is the tendency to prioritize others’ needs, approval, and comfort over your own—often at the expense of your well-being. It means saying “yes” when you want to say “no,” avoiding conflict, and always seeking validation to feel seen and valued. (Definition from the web.)

I got used to needing that validation. I became the extra friend, the third wheel, the always-smiling girl who never got angry. My feelings didn’t matter—to me or to anyone around me. I just wanted to belong. Not because I wasn’t loved at home, but because I overthought everything.

“Will they like me?”

“Will I fit in here?”

At some point, I realised—harsh as it sounds—most people don’t truly care about how you’re doing. Not because they don’t care, but because they’re drowning too. Drowning in their own fears, insecurities, and silent battles. So why keep reaching out your hands to be held by people who don’t even see them?

The truth? You don’t need to be liked by everyone. You don’t need to keep shrinking yourself to fit into spaces that were never meant for you. You are enough as you are. And you deserve peace without begging for it.

Trying to please everyone is slow self-erasure. It’s giving your power to people who won’t even remember your name in five years. It’s living life like a mirror—only reflecting others, never shining on your own.

Say no without guilt.

Walk away without regret.

Put yourself first, because no one else is waking up every day in your skin, in your thoughts, in your pain. Validation feels good, but it’s not love. And it’s not lasting.

Find your voice.

Own your silence.

Choose joy that doesn’t need applause.

Let go of the obsession to be chosen.

You are already worthy.

Go out there, improve your skills, dive into your passions. Do the things that make you feel alive. Don’t trade your peace for applause or your identity for approval. Trying to be everyone’s favourite will only leave you feeling empty—because in chasing everyone, you forget yourself. And losing yourself is the worst kind of loss.

Choose you. Always.