The Bizarre Life of Edgar Strange

Chapter 1

The birds chirped outside. The sunlight poured into Edgar Strange’s bedroom window. The rest of Edgar’s bedroom was shrouded in darkness. The lid to Edgar’s wooden coffin popped open. The inside of the coffin was lined with pillows. Edgar’s father Mike knocked on his son’s bedroom door. ‘’Come in,’’ Edgar said. Mike opened the door and a bat flew towards his head. ‘’ Yikes,’’ Mike shrieked.‘’Edgar how many 'mes have I told you to keep that darn bat inside its cage,’’ Mike shrieked. “I’m sorry father,’’ Edgar spoke so+ly. Edgar whistled and the bat $ew into the bedroom. The bat perched on the index -nger and the middle -nger too. ‘’Marty now you know you aren’t supposed to be out of your cage,’’ Edgar scolded his bat. Edgar placed his bat inside its cage and Edgar closed the door behind the bird. ‘’Hurry up and get ready I am taking you to school today,’’ Mike said. ‘’Ok,’’ Edgar groaned. The clouds burst open and rain water poured out of them. The rain tapped against the windshield of Mike’s 1999 Ford pickup truck. The truck shone so brilliantly the car could have passed for maybe a 06 or maybe an 07 even. Mike pulled his truck out in the horseshoe where

back. ‘’Whatever,’’ Debbie rolled her eyes as she tossed her cascading blonde hair over her shoulders. Debbie took her usual place in the front of the class. ‘’Li;le Miss perfect why doesn’t she just go jump o< a cli< or something,’’ Edgar thought bitterly. He folded his arms across his chest and he scowled as he glared at his mortal enemy. Debbie no'ced Edgar was staring at so she stuck her tongue out at Edgar. At lunch'me Edgar scanned his eyes across the cafeteria. He grinned when he found a vacant table at the back of the cafeteria. As he walked past Debbie’s table she stuck her foot out. Edgar groaned as he tripped and fell to the ground. The mashed potatoes $ew up in the air and landed in Edgar’s hair. The cafeteria -lled with uproarious laughter as an en're elementary school student body pointed at poor Edgar and laughed. The fury in Edgar’s eyes burned with the intensity of a caged demon as he glared up at the seemingly evil Debbie. Debbie smirked as she gazed down at Edgar. Edgar stood up and he stomped o< angrily out of the cafeteria. He walked into the bathroom and he grabbed some paper towels out of the paper towel dispenser. Edgar turned the metal handle of the paper towel dispenser. To Edgar it sounded like a person being hoisted up by the neck and being hung.

Edgar imagined a town square from the 1800’s and everyone watching in horror as Edgar hoisted Debbie high in the air as her feet dangled in the air and the noose 'ghtened around her throat. He wiped the potatoes out of his hair with the dry paper towel. He tossed the paper towel into the wastepaper basket and ran some cold water in his le+ hand and next he splashed some water in his hair to get rid of the s'ckiness. He pulled his skeleton comb out of his front, breast pocket and calmly he parted his hair down the middle. When he got home that day Edgar ran up to his bedroom and he slammed his bedroom door shut. He collapsed on the bed and he burst into tears. ‘’Why must I be cursed with the affliction of being tormented by that wicked creature they call Debbie,’’ Edgar thought bitterly to himself. ‘’How by the God I adore how can I exact my revenge on that cruel witch Debbie how,’’ Edgar thought rather bi;erly. Edgar sat up and he wiped the tears from his eyes using his shirt sleeve. Edgar walked over to his dresser and he picked up his magazine called ‘’Creepy Junk Magazine’’ and he thumbed through it. His eyes lit up when he saw an ar'cle discussing how to make your own voodoo doll. He grabbed some yellow yarn, scissors, two bu;ons and an old sock and Edgar fashioned a voodoo doll out of it. The next day Edgar took his usual spot at the back of the cafeteria. He stared at that witch Debbie as he calmly sipped his milk through a purple straw.