GOD LAUGHS LAST, pt. 2

Lucas

**************

"You stupid son of a bitch. I can't believe this shit. Drop your fuckin' wallet in the middle of a fuckin'crime scene. I should of made you do this yourself."

"I'm sorry, Lucas. I said I'm sorry a million fucking times. What if it's in the water with the girl?" Red whined.

"Then, buddy, you're screwed. Just calm down. More likely it fell out of your pocket while we were bringing in the boat or dragging her to the dock," I tried to reassure him.

Jesus, I had to have the stupidest friends on earth. They all had fun fucking the chick when I brought her to the cottage. Now, Mark, and even my little bro were acting like they weren't even there. Like I was the only one to fuck her. If that wasn't bad enough, this idiot thinks he lost his wallet when we were dumping her ass in the lake.

He was so shaky I didn't dare let him come back here alone. No telling what he'd do if he got feeling guilty. About a quarter mile from the cottage I could see the campground cleaning van parked in the driveway.

"Shit. That cleaning woman is here."

"Oh, God. Oh, no. What should we do?" Red gulped, sweat running down his face in the ice-cold air conditioning of my Ram.

"Shut up and let me think," I snapped.

Driving down the road, I found a small clearing where the truck couldn't be seen from the road. "We walk back and start looking near the dock. She can't see it from where the van is and it looks like she's inside anyway."

The sooner we found his wallet or established that he didn't leave it there, the better. I didn't want to hang around this place one minute more than I needed to.

Ducking under low-hanging branches next to the cat tails and muck near the dock, we began our search through the weeds. I had work gloves on, which made raking through the mud easier.

As I was about to give up on this ridiculous mission, Red called out, "Hey, Lucas, it's here! Can you believe I found it?" he said, wiping mud and crap off the leather case. "Thank God. I was afraid it got pitched into the lake when we threw that dead chick in! Oh, my God. I was sure we were going to prison for the rest of our lives for rape and murder!"

"You wanna tell Channel 5 the fuckin' news, asshat? What the fuck is wrong with you?" I warned him.

Jesus, what an idiot.

It started raining. That was wrong. There wasn't a cloud in the sky and it was 80 degrees. Yet, we were getting soaked. Looking around, I almost had a heart attack when a little red-haired girl in shorts and a Minnie Mouse T-shirt giggled at us from behind the cottage, garden hose in hand.

"You're wet! What's a rape?" she innocently asked, looking perplexed.

"Oh, shit," Red muttered, almost falling in the weeds.

"It's a bird that eats little girls," I said threateningly, hoping to scare her away before any more damage was done. "You better get away from here. We just saw one."

She put her hands on her hips and looked at me skeptically. "I don't believe you. Who got in the water? Why was somebody a dead chick?"

"Man, oh, man," Red said, as he dashed for the little terrorist with the hose.

"What the fuck are you doing? We can leave. She don't know squat!" I yelled at him.

She thought he was playing and began spraying him with the hose, making him angrier by the second. "You little shit. Stop that!"

"You said a bad word. I'm tellin'," she threatened and stuck out her tongue before running toward the front of the building.

I considered leaving him behind to save my own ass, which would have been the smartest thing to do. But Red was already feeling confessy, and I didn't dare leave him with the kid and her mother. I took off after him just as he grabbed the kid by the hair and dragged her back toward the dock.

"Ow, ow, stop! You're hurting me! Stop!" the kicking toddler screamed as Red wrapped a couple of sinewy arms around her squirming body.

"What are we going to do with her, Lucas? She heard us talking about killing that chick from the bar."

"We? We? We aren't going to do anything with her, Dumbshit. Give her here," I ordered, the look on my face gave him no other options.

My mind spun a thousand miles an hour to figure out how to explain this to the mother, and then leave before she called the cops on us. I was good at lying, so this would be easy if Red kept his trap shut.

"I'm sorry, honey," I said, smoothing down her hair and wiping away tears with my shirt, "That man can't think right and he thought he was playing tag with you. I'm sorry if he scared you. You go along now, back to the little house, and we'll leave." I said, as I set her down on the ground and turned to Red, who was shaking in his soggy sneakers. "See?" I said as the little girl scambled back to the cottage, leaving us free to go.

"Beanie! Beanie! I told you to stay put. Where are you?" The mother called out from the cottage door, as Red and I slithered through the weeds and hiked back up the road to my truck. Goddamned Red. Maybe I should finish him off like that bitch, Veronica. He was going to send us all to prison. I could feel it in my bones.

I'd wait until the cleaning lady drove away, then I'd back Red's boat to the dock and tell him we shouldn't waste a good day for fishing. When we got to the middle of the lake I'd push him over and run him down with the prop.

Problem solved.