Bound by Darkness

Chapter 5: Shadows of the Past

Vincent breathed in his past, the heaviness encircling him as his past pressed on his shoulders. For the first time, he had never told anyone his backstory but Lily looked to be the only exception to this.

"I have changed. I was not always like this," Vincent started with a quivering voice. "There was a time when I was a little kid, with so many dreams and quite naive. But that was a long time ago."

Lily was looking at him attentively with her filled with empathy and concern eyes. She squeezed his hand, silently urging him to go on.

"I really did not understand love. There was no such thing as love in my house," Vincent said explaining the situation with his mother's absent-minded far-away gaze. "My dad was a monster, a person who stood for power by means of violence and fright. My mother, was...I don't know if I should call her that, for she was just a shadow of the woman she used to be, falling spirally from years of being treated like a stray. She was already beaten before I was even born."

The boy halted a moment before the painfully carried-away memories came back on. "I lived through some awful days, every day was a nightmare.The loss of sensation seemed to be the only option I had, the best way of fleeing the war. It was the only path that led to survival."

Lily's heart went out to the little boy that once was Vincent, a kid locked in a world full of suffering. She reached out and brushed his cheek gently, her eyes mirroring the sorrow she had inside for him.

"As I approached my teenage years," Vincent continued, "I figured to get any spec of control in my life, I had to turn into the hunter from the hunted. It was a twisted logic but to my perspective, it should provide me with a bit of my power childhood had taken away from me. I thrived on the fear and power I saw in my victims' eyes. It was a brief moment but it did make me feel alive."

"But it never lasted. It always comes back, even more painful and compelling. I was walking in the world as an empty vessel with no purpose or meaning.";

Lily was attentively listening, she felt very sorry for the man in front of her. Finally, she realized the reasons why Vincent had become the type of person he was by doing such a horrific act and the examination of those reasons taught her an important lesson. It did not make what Vincent had done right, but she got a glimpse of the darkness that defined him during that time.

"Meeting you, Lily," Vincent responded, the emotion in his voice was palpable, "changed everything. You showed me that there was another approach, that was not necessary for me to be a part of my to the past. At the glimpse of the hope, I have ever seen in life, I was so despairing."

Lily's eyes had tears streaming down them, and she started to move towards Vincent. "Vincent, thanks for being so open with me. Though I don't know how difficult it was for you to talk about, you are not a reflection of your past. You have already taken some steps to change, and I will be here to help you all the way."

Vincent was overwhelmed with thankfulness and relief. He felt that expressing his story was the most healing experience and Lily's strong support reassured him to continue his way to redemption. He thought that there would be difficulties on the way that he had to overcome, for the first time in his life he believed he could do this.

Vincent maintained the community center work by the course of the days, eventually getting so used to its routine and his groups that he forgot about his sorrow for real. He got a busy plan, a way to transform his agony into something good. He was assigned counseling as well as sessions for counseling and support of trauma victims and most recently, he started working during the week too.

Lily was always by his side showing him the way and empowering him. The bonds that held them together became even stronger with each day that passed, and Vincent was so touched that he began to share things with her that he never believed he could. She was the rock that grounded him, a guiding light in the midst of the gloom still remaining.

But Vincent's hard-won balance was shattered when a figure from his past returned. As they were leaving the community center, Vincent felt a brooding shiver of fear as the shadow of a younger man crossed the street... The figure stood there with a savage smile on his lips making Vincent turn his head away. He was the man that Lily's eyes had caught.

"Vincent," Lily said calmly, noticing the change in his mood. "Who is that?"

Vincent's face tensed, his heart pounding hard. "It is an ex acquaintance of mine. I wished I would never meet him again. "

The stranger walked forward methodically, and his actions were quite scary. Automatically, Vincent turned to protect Lily, with the thoughts of his past coming to his mind again.

"Oh, serious," the man snorted. "It's Vincent. Look how the little thing has grown. He's playing the hero. How lovely."

Vincent's hands clenched tightly to his sides, his body shaking from a mixture of fear and rage. "What do you want?"

The man laughed wickedly, his eyes shining sadistically. "I just thought I'd check your one against you. It's been so long already. Anyway, yes, I see you're no more lonely since you've got a chic little thing."

Lily advanced, her eyes shining with resolution. "Stop bothering him," she said definitively. "He's not the guy you're imagining he is."

"Oh, I indeed understand who he is. And you should too, dear. Don't let him deceive you.

Vincent panicked again. This person is so important for him because his whole life depends on the good that he made and the bad that he got over. He knew that he couldn't let his past define his future, but the fear of losing everything was almost too much to bear.

While the man was continuing to provoke him, Vincent suddenly saw that he has an option. He could be overwhelmed by fear and anger, or he could confront his demons and get over the past. He inhaled deeply, his determination solidifying.

"Correct. I am not the same person anymore," Vincent affirmed and maintained his unwavering voice. "And It won't let you make me go back that way of life."

"I am glad that the man was so confident but his eyes made him look less sure. "We shall see then," he said as he left both of the standing and staring each other in the blur of twilight.

She turned to Vincent, her eyes full of concern. "Are you okay?"

Vincent nodded, his heart still going wild. "I will be. Thank you for speaking up on my behalf, Lily. I don't know what I would have done if it weren't for you."

She smiled, her eyes reflecting her pride. "You are not alone in this fight, Vincent. We are in this together.

Vincent got feelings of gratitude and love. He realized that he had to get to the end of the road of restoration; however, with Lily as his companion, he knew that he would manage to escape any wall that appeared along his path. The confrontation with the man from his past had been a harsh reminder of the darkness that still hung around him, but it had also been a demonstration of the power that he had and the love he received in Lily.

With a renewed force in his soul, Vincent went on to work at the community center trying his best to assist others to get over their own traumas. He realized that he couldn't change the past, but he was determined to make a brighter future by taking one step at a time. Besides that, he also believed that it is possible with Lily by his side.