The Four Agreements

About two years ago, my life took an unexpected turn. I simply had decided that maybe I wasn't meant to be a famous author. For years, I tormented myself with the thought that maybe I was not good enough.

I have been sitting on a novel for about ten years. It's ready to go, but after being told by someone that they were going to write a book, just to spite me, I stopped. I had quit the ONE thing that I knew I was good at.

Almost everyone around me showed no interest in the fact of how my eyes would light up, when I spoke of my "novel". I'm low key a perfectionist, so I just kept editing, adding, and correcting; always feeling like I should add more. I did some research and found that to publish my dream it would be a little over a thousand dollars to bring this thing into fruition. I felt so discouraged.

However, life seemed to always get in the way of my creativity. No one was rooting me on. I just got the looks of "silly faces" of those I called friends. I had told them my dreams. I had shared my vision. No one believed in me. And slowly, I stopped believing as well.

After constantly being underestimated, I hit a rock bottom. I was ready to give up. I had come to the conclusion that maybe I wasn't special and maybe it was my fate to live a life of poverty; always trusting a struggle. I began to believe that I would be locked into "survival" mode forever.

A relative invited me to a retreat at a farm in my hometown. It was there I released some of my pain, and began to start this journey again. It was there I met the owner of the farm who listened intensely to what I wanted to do.

A few months later, my "sister in spirit" gifted me with a book called, "The Four Agreements" -A Toltec Wisdom Book by Don Miguel Ruiz.

The first chapter intrigued me. It spoke about how as children we didn't have the opportunity to chose our own beliefs but we agreed to the information that was given. As I read on it led me to the the first agreement:

1. Be Impeccable with your word.

Basically, you are not to use the words of others, against yourself. For example, if someone says you can't dance and you listen to that statement and AGREE with that statement, you are using their words against yourself. You could be an awesome dancer, but if you don't believe it based upon another's opinion, you are putting a negative spell on yourself.

I realized that very fast that I had been doing this to myself my whole life. Once I read that chapter I made a silent promise to myself to not agree with negative statements are opinions about myself. Because if I believe it, even though it may not be true, it will be, based upon my negative thinking of myself.

With this agreement, one should use the word to share love. The first step is to create your own "white" magic; beginning with yourself. This chapter speaks about telling yourself how good, wonderful, and successful you are. The key is to break tiny agreements you made against yourself or agreements that make you suffer.

2. Don't take Anything Personal.

This was a hard one for me, because I take everything personal and to the heart, especially if it is negative. It is a piece of advice that can help one get through this thing we call life. The chapter speaks about the fact that if you take things personal about what someone says about you, you agree with what they said.

Author Ruiz says that when you take something personal that someone has said about you, you to take on their personal garbage; in turn making it your own. Whatever people do or say, do not take it personal! Whether it is good or bad.

3. Don't make assumptions.

I know many of us has heard the saying: When you assume, you make an "ass" out of you. Author Ruiz explains that when you make assumptions about what others think and do, we take it personally and react by sending poison through our word.

As a child and as an adult, I assumed things and then formed my opinion based on what I assumed, even though what I may have assumed could be the furthest from the truth. You create a whole scenario and react based upon what you think was said or done.

4. Always do your best.

The final agreement is for you to always do your best. This agreement ties into the other agreements because sometimes your best will vary depending on the situation. For example, you will tend to do your best if you get a good nights rest and eat breakfast, opposed to you trying to do something when you are tired or sick.

While reading this book it came to me that there were times when I tried to do more than my best. In those moments, I wasted energy in not accepting the fact that my best was in fact, good enough; depending on the situation.

This book has inspired me and I try to incorporate these agreements into my daily life, even now as I write this story. It propelled me to start back on my novel again. I started doing the research, and found out that I can actually self-publish my own novel on Amazon, for free.

In conclusion, I challenge all readers to check out this book. It provided me with a self awareness I had never known before. It doesn't matter what stage of life you are in. This novel can really help you realize how we as humans can easily self sabotage if we agree with the thoughts and actions of others. Awesome read. Try it for yourself!