Curly Hair Madness

Natural curly hair has some bonuses–another strand of beauty, standing out, a thick layer of warmth on your head, and not having to go to a salon to get permed. Sadly, it took me years to love my hair when other negative factors made me wish to have straight hair or no hair at all. Here are some of them that haunted me to no end:

1. High Maintenance

Curly hair requires constant brushing because snarls and knots are more likely. In August 2016, I stopped caring about combing my hair because it wasted so much of my time. Brushing is also painful. As a result, I formed three big knots on the top of my forehead. If my hair is already a bother, seeing those knots made me feel even worse. I tried to hide them by putting them in a hat or putting them in a bun. I couldn’t brush them out. My Dad got frustrated that he brushed my hair with a cat brush. I looked like a guy at the end of it and got disgusted looks from people in public with my back turned. I didn’t care; I was glad I was free of it.

Hair sprays and products make my hair greasy, so I only brush and comb while my hair is wet. I used to get it done in the shower until my hair burst a cap pipe downstairs over years of brushing in the shower. Strands of hair do fall while brushing, and my drain didn’t have a filter to block out the hair. Whoops. Dad wasn’t mad though. It was an easy fix. I brush it once I get out of the shower. I always watch a video to distract myself from the discomfort. These days, it takes fifteen minutes at most to tend to my hair, which is not bad.

2. Touching Without Consent

There were multiple instances when people touched or played with my hair without consent. It can get very irritating. My hair is curly, long, and soft, inviting people to touch it. I have tolerance when it comes to my family when I allow them to play with my hair, and there are occasions when I don’t want them to touch it. Conflict will be avoided if the person just asks. If I say, “Don’t touch my hair,” please stop. Even when someone’s being ‘nice’ to my hair, my hair hides many of my yelling levers– one wrong spot is all it takes for me to yell at the person. I have incidents of people mocking my warning or pulling my hair despite being asked to stop.

I learned to lower unwanted touching by hiding most of my hair in a hoodie, hat, or shirt. I will still warn people not to touch my hair. If they persist, I shoot a glare. If they pull my hair, they’ll be a character in my horror story (possible charges because it’s assault). Fortunately, no adults have yanked my hair for a while now, and I am hoping they keep it that way.

3. Bullying

Brushing my hair isn’t already peaceful, and bullying doesn’t help. I have been made fun of for my appearance and actions (Autism). They often pick on my breasts, face, and hair. I was called ugly, transgender (I’m not. It’s okay to ask, but don’t flat-out assume), poodle, and had food thrown at me. Students compared my hair to a different timeline or said something similar to having no friends due to my hair looking like crap. During that time, I tried to maintain my hair as best as possible and had more knots than I do currently. The kids who said that had straight hair. I often believe people with straight hair have it easier. I know they still need to manage it, but it’s not as difficult with people with curly hair. When my hair is straightened for a special occasion, I always find it easier to manage for a few days when it’s more straight than usual.

Bullying eased down over the years, replaced by flirting (mostly uncomfortable). I just ignore it now or sass back.

4. Self-Esteem

Yeah, my hair dictates my self-esteem. There are days I look prettier, and there are other days I am disgusted at myself and want to shave it off. Sometimes, I mentally break down while brushing my hair because there are so many snarls, and I’m not even close to finishing. I usually thought, Can this end? Why are so many snarls? Hair, why are you a bee nest? I need to ask Rapunzel for her secrets on how to keep a smile while brushing her hair. I probably need to sing.

5. Hair Jumpscare

I do not mean popping out of a hot tub with hair all over my face and crawling out, pretending to be a grudge covered in bubbles. I’m talking hair coming into my face where I least expected and wanted it to. It blocks my view while cleaning the house, and I can’t sweep it away without risking getting cleaning chemicals all over my face. I have to use my elbow to nudge it out of my face, only to pop in front of it again. I can't put it up because my hairbands were stolen by family members over the years; therefore, finding them is more of a mystery.

Other than chores, there’s eating, where hair gets stuck in my food or inside my mouth, giving me a cheap flossing session. It gets frustrating when I just showered, and my hair decides to swim in sauce. I usually wipe it off or use my headset to push my hair back while eating.

6. Heat– No Fun.

I prefer to get a haircut during the summer because long hair makes me warm up faster. My curly hair also frizzes and dries out, especially the ends. Short hair also makes me look professional, so that’s nice.

In the warmer months, the bugs can sneak into my hair. I’m outside multiple hours daily and don’t notice them until I’m inside and feel them crawling. I have to dig just to pull them out. Did I forget to mention that bees can get into my hair too? I got stung in the neck because of it while swinging. Better than the head.

7. Items Getting Stuck

The brush's paddle got ripped off and stuck in my hair a couple of times. When this first happened, I laughed a bit. At school, pencils and pens get stuck in my hair. Fuzzies and tiny bits of material can hide in there. It takes someone to notice to get them off me, which might be a hassle. Snarls and frizz trap items in their place. This problem can be helpful if I want to turn my hair into a shelf for my school supplies or a way to dress up for the holidays by placing Christmas ornaments in my hair. This gives me an idea when visiting a relative’s house on Christmas Eve.

Conclusion

If you want to magically wish to have curly hair, changes must be acknowledged. Curly hair is not unadaptable. As long you have it managed, comb and brush it regularly (every other day will suffice), and not let people and self-esteem get to you, you will enjoy it.