Serotonin, Freedom, and Rebellion: My Teen Playlist

I'm very excited to be writing about this! Music was the thing that kept me happy and optimistic in my teens and still does to this day. I didn't really listen to what my friends listened to because I couldn't really relate to it. I liked listening to songs that gave me a feeling to soar and fly.

This story will be submitted for the "Teen Angst Playlist" challenge. I think they will expect the story to contain songs that made them feel rebellious, but these songs made me feel like following my dreams in the best possible way.

Here are the songs that were an important part of my adolescence and shaped me to be the person I am today.

Nujabes - Shiki No Uta

This gem I found while watching Samurai Champloo when I was 14 years old. When the episode ended, this song played, and I was immediately obsessed. I would reply to the song every day to learn the words in Japanese and told everyone I would have a tattoo on my wrist saying "Shiki No Uta" to remind me of that part of myself that truly wanted to be myself.

Shiki No Uta 四季の歌 translates to "Song Of Four Seasons," and in an interview from OtaQuest.com, she shares that they used beats from a previous track that was already produced into the song. The beat she's referring to is "Beats Lamenants the World." featuring a continuous rap verse from MC Pase Rock.

The beat and melody reminded me of when I was younger and had more light and curiosity to see the beauty in things. This song was also my drive to be myself.

Same Love - Macklemore ft. Mary Lambert

This song doesn't need to be explained as to why I love it so much. I've been in the closet for the longest time. (Technically still am. I have not told my parents.) When I first listened to this song, I literally got on my knees and cried. I've always felt emotional listening to the song, especially because I was someone who closeted their feelings for women.

That song became controversial because of the message and stirred as the main conversation of my spirituality. This song, also came out when I was experiencing criticism of my suicide attempts and questions of my pansexuality. If I could thank Mackelmore in person, I definitely would. That song pushed me to be confident in my own skin and be proud of who I am.

MYK & Shiroksy - Picasso ft Manifest

This song is so underrated. Honestly, this song is one of the many reasons why I wanted to be a writer. The lyricism, the chorus, the beat itself is chef's kiss. I would listen to this song on repeat as I would write my slam poetry in high school.

This came out way before Lo-fi hip-hop became a well-known thing, and I'm truly blessed to have found this song. I listened to this song for the first time in years, and it was almost as if the 16-year-old girl came back.

Can't Hold Us- Macklemore

I tell you, this song gave me so much serotonin! I absolutely loved this song when it first came out! It honestly made me drive into wanting to follow my dreams. My parents grew up around 90's rap, so of course, they were quick to criticize, but I would blast these songs and dance in my bedroom like a maniac. Truly a song that perfectly describes my adolescence.

This song honestly gave me so much energy. It made me feel good. The music video was something I truly wanted to experience. Being in a crowd and jumping the music, and feeling the same energy as everyone.

Pogo - Alice

This song is the reason I am obsessed with surrealism and the study of metaphysics. I've always liked the story of Alice In Wonderland. The story was so mysterious and captivating to me as a child. But seeing this edit and Pogo's style of music, I quickly fell in love with it.

This video is ahead of its time, taking scenes from the movie, and creating a futuristic tune to it. It's truly nostalgic for me.

I remember showing this to my friends, and they would look at me as if I just committed a murder. I didn't care though. Well, maybe a little bit. But it was a song that I truly enjoyed.

Flying Lotus - Massage Situation

Ah yes. The song that started my rebel against my Christian beliefs. The visuals in the video, as well as the song itself, was the start of me finding out about psychedelics, meditation, and astral projection.

Flying Lotus' music was mostly featured on Adult Swim, along with J Dilla, Nujabes, and Mf Doom. His style of music is more of an experience in itself. I honestly felt like I was going against what I was brought up on, because of how the song made me feel. Growing up Christian, songs like these are almost sinful to be listening to. Now, with my African Spirituality and Hinduism teachings, I can listen to the song without feeling like I'm breaking the law, I truly feel liberated.

Yuna - Live Your Life

Last but certainly not least, this song. Yuna's aesthetics in the video and the rhythm & beats in the song make the song unique and truly pushed me to be more of myself. The lyrics are very empowering but soft, giving a soulful vibe to the song.

This was also the reason why I decided to cut my hair short and wear colors. She truly brought out a part of me that allowed me to come out of my shell. I feel truly myself whenever I heard this song.

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-Frankiesha