In Metal, Chivalry is dead

If you ever spent a winter in New England you know the meaning of the word cold. Red nose, blue lips, Oh my God I can't feel my face, Cold! You begin to think that had you gone down with the Titanic it would have been nothing more than a late night dip with friends. It was just such a night when my girlfriend Jacqueline and I went to a club in down town Boston to see Ace Freahley in concert. These were the days before kids, no responsibilities, a fast sports car and when we by anyone's standards, looked HOT! She with her next to platinum long hair, I with my Vixen teased long red hair it was all we could do to fit in my car without removing the sunroof. Now as it happens when women believe they look good, to Hell with a coat. We were no exception. Black stiletto heels, low cut blouse, see through arm sleeves, ah yes, a case of hypothermia in the making if ever there was one. The line to the club consisted mostly of guys, and all eyes were on us! Naturally we looked board. We made our way to the door and in this particular club they checked your I.D and put a colored bracelet on your wrist. One color if you were old enough to drink, another color if you couldn't. As I stood there with my arm stretched out thinking I was all that and a bag of chips I noticed how dark the inside of this club was. Even if it had sold to it's max capacity it couldn't have held more than 500 persons. There was an upstairs that looked over the dance floor, a bar to my left and just beyond that the staircase leading to the bathrooms. I began walking in towards the middle of the dance floor where I noticed about 5 head bangers standing in a group. Each one had hair to the middle of their backs. As I walked I never saw that little 2 inch step up to the dance floor and with everything I had I hit that step head on in those stiletto heels immediately cracking my big toe and the next thing I knew I was falling face first! It was as though it was happening in slow motion as I took out the first 3 head bangers. I can remember vividly seeing their knees buckle and their hair fly up off their backs as they fell in front of me. I was like this big red wrecking ball destroying all in its path! I laid there with carpet fibers stuck in my teeth, spread out like a giant swastika. My " Good " friend Jacqueline left me and headed to the bar pretending not to know me. The pain from my broken toe was making me dizzy. I looked up and noticed the head bangers getting up, dusting themselves off and glaring at me with burning eyes of death! With my last shred of dignity I picked myself up and headed for the stairs dragging my broken toe and shredded pantyhose up to the bathroom where I locked myself in a stall and watched my foot swell! After a few moments Jacqueline came in, drink in hand calling my name, and laughing so hard she could barely breathe! I had to be talked into leaving my stall. Somehow I no longer looked so Hot what with the swollen toe that I could no longer fit into my heels, my flattened out hair, smudged lipstick, and shredded pantyhose. We left the club only 3 songs into Ace's set. Jacqueline slightly buzzed, me limping down the sidewalk with no shoes and frostbite setting in. I learned a lesson that night. As good as you think you are, there is always something or someone that will remind you to be humble. I also learned that in the world of metal, chivalry is dead!