Good Grief

When Dessa first asked,

They say there's good grief

But how can you tell it from the bad?

I had never even considered the question.

"Good grief" was just a saying to me. An exclamation used to convey surprise. It was just another facet of life that seemed set, like the fact that the sun sets in the evening and rises in the morning.

It's a good question.

The closest Dessa gets to an answer is this:

Maybe it's only in the fact

Good grief's the one that's in your past.

It's a mournful statement. She's trying to cope with something that still feels very fresh, and she doesn't have a fully formed answer.

I didn't expect to find one in an upbeat pop song.

Marielle Kraft presents a very similar sentiment, but in a more hopeful way. The song is still bittersweet and tinged with longing, but the focus is on her hope for the future instead of the ache of the loss.

This is goodbye to a bad thing

This is goodnight to a bad dream

Losing something I wasn't meant to keep

It's a refreshing contrast to Dessa's melancholy. Not that there's anything wrong with that--Dessa has been open about her struggle to write more upbeat music. Music is for self-expression. Dessa's music simply fits a fairly particular niche. She's managed to branch out in recent years because she challenged herself to do so, and I wouldn't blame her at all if she hadn't done that, but much of her music is fairly broody.

I want that good grief

The one that heals me

That leaves me clarified by fire

When I'm burned clean

Dessa's song does portray a similar sentiment--maybe when this is over, I'll be better for it--but it's more of a hope. She doesn't understand yet how it could be good at all. She's reaching for it, but she hasn't found it yet.

Marielle has sat with that sentiment for a while. She's taken time to process, to write, to figure out what to do with that bitter longing that permeates everything you do when you're in mourning.

I'm on the sweet side of bitter

I'm on the green side of winter

I can see the way out and I'm headed there now

Whereas Dessa's song conveys more of the rough, raw process of growing through the pain, Marielle's focuses on the light at the end of the tunnel.

This is better but it feels worse

This is healthy but it still hurts

Becoming who I'm supposed to be

I'm losing everything but me

This is good grief

It's rare that I find a songwriter that can so much as come close to Dessa's brilliance, and that's why I'm so excited about this unexpected matchup. It's tough to compete with lines like "Pirouette through the hardwood to hit paydirt," but although the wording is a bit more simplistic, the sentiment is just as mature.

Bury the hatchet

Bouquet on the casket

I'm making peace with how it had to happen

Bury the hatchet

Bouquet on the casket

I'll let the wind take the ashes

It takes a lot of patience to get to this point. Most people never achieve it. I think that's why this song is so calming. It's like a balm for when you leave the fire Dessa mentions. It's like new growth after the forest has been destroyed.

Night falls, day breaks; time

Has a funny kind of violence and I'm

Tryna keep in mind

It can't leave you the way it finds you

Good grief

~::~

I've linked them in the hypertext over their names, but you can find the artists here: