🎵 FAILURE TO LOVE 🎶

VERSE I

I still love you in spite of my heartless wintriness

My heart's been immured by fear and cowardice

I could've joined you on the deep end of the swimming pool

I guess I was just too afraid

Surely in your eyes this fear of drowning is a humiliating weakness

And I understand why you couldn't wait

for someone doomed to play the part of an inferior fool

PRE-CHORUS

It felt like friendship was forming between us

Did you feel it or

CHORUS

Was this just one more failure to love?

This swimming pool is safe and toxic

It was just one more failure to love

Am I really better off alone here?

My drowning heart is my holy water sanctuary

VERSE II

I got used to playing on the shallow end

My feet could touch the floor

and I could swim with reasonable ease

Over time I believed the shallow end was all there was for me

even if it wasn't that much fun

Gravity and the proximity of the floor robbed me of the liberating pleasure of swimming

on the deep end of the swimming pool

PRE-CHORUS

It felt like friendship was forming between us

Did you feel it or

CHORUS

Was this just one more failure to love?

This swimming pool is safe and toxic

It was just one more failure to love

Am I really better off alone here?

My drowning heart is my holy water sanctuary

VERSE III

Shallow waters

Chlorine

Deep waters

Chlorine

Shallow breathing

Chlorine

Unreal waters

Suffocating, drowning

Chlorine

The sharp sting of water through my nose

My heart is flooded, drowning in its own tainted blood.

Red blood cells

Parasites

Chlorine

Bad choices

Chalk them up to fate

If only you could've been my toxic valentine

Tough luck

I had a karmic fine to pay for all the people I've betrayed

PRE-CHORUS

It felt like friendship was forming between us

Did you feel it or

CHORUS

Was this just one more failure to love?

This swimming pool is safe and toxic

It was just one more failure to love

Am I really better off alone here?

My drowning heart is my holy water sanctuary

VERSE IV

Now I haunt the water like a ghost in waiting

Each ripple remembers what I tried to forget

Your silhouette still floats in my memory, weightless

But I'm still anchored to regret

I trace the tiles like a rosary of what might've been

Sanctified by pain and chlorine

I baptize myself in guilt and reflection

Sins washed clean in a pool that's never been serene

Maybe this was always meant to be a one-sided miracle

A final chance I was too broken to claim

If love is a ritual, I fumbled the rite

But maybe drowning was my only way

To feel the depth of what I couldn't say

OUTRO

I'm still here, toes pruning in chlorinated confession,

whispering apologies to the blue that never forgives.

You're gone, clean and dry,

while I sink in penance,

arms outstretched like a failed messiah.

If this was a love song,

then silence was always my loudest verse.

No lifeguard, no witness--just echoes in the drain.

You learned to swim away

I only learned to stay.